The Little Mermaid: Evolution
by AnonGirl88
Summary: This is a Jott romance. The title explains it all: the cast of XMen: Evolution stars in a parody of The Little Mermaid
1. The Beginning

AN: Greetings and salutations! This is my first ever fanfic! Wouldn't you know, it's a parody. If you're reading it, PLEASE REVIEW! Constructive criticism would be extremley helpful. I need all the help that I can get!

Dude: You can say that again!

AnonGirl88: Shut up. hits Dude with a wet mop Let's get started. And I'm only going to do this stupid disclaimer ONCE so pay attention.

Disclaimer: AnonGirl88 does not own the characters of X-Men: Evolution, nor does she own The Little Mermaid. This is a non-profit parody of which AnonGirl88 is not gaining any profit from.

_**The Little Mermaid: Evolution**_

* * *

A seagull caws far off in the distance as waves crash gently on a sandy beach. A sixteen year old girl with thin framed glasses and short red hair wearing a dark blue t-shirt and jeans is sitting beneath a palm tree, passed out and snoring. A coconut flies from out of no where and smacks her on the head. She wakes up instantly, very angry.

"OW! What was that for!" she screams in the direction the coconut came from.

"You're on!" a voice whispers.

"What do you mean I'm, oh." she looks forward and instantly smiles. "Hello! And welcome to The Little Mermaid: Evolution, a parody of the Disney movie," she pauses to pull out a clip-board. "The Little Mermaid, performed by the cast of X-Men: Evolution. I am the director, AnonGirl88. Well, what are we waiting for? Lights, came-"

"NON! NON, NON, NON!" Remy Lebeau stomps angrily over to AnonGirl88.

"Not now, Remy." AnonGirl88 says boredley, flipping through the papers.

"OUI, NOW! 'DERE AIN'T NO WAY YOU GONNA MAKE REMY DE STUPID CRAB!"

"You get to see Rogue as a mermaid."

"Remy'll be backstage if you need him." Remy says pleasantly before leaving.

"That's what I thought. Alright, where were we? Oh yeah, lights, ca-" Before she can finish, Pietro speeds up from out of no where. "Oh for heaven's sakes, what now?" she snaps at him.

"WhydoIhavetobeoneofthestupideels?" he asks rapidly.

"Slower, speedy." AnonGirl88 says.

"Why do I have to be one of the stupid eels?" Pietro repeats.

"Because that part is perfect for you." she replies. "He's evil, sneaky, manipulative, kind of charming."

"Flattery will get you no where."

"Get lost!" She hits him with her clip board before he speeds off. "Action!"

The music begins to play as the camera leaves the beach and shows the sea. Seagulls fly in front of the camera just as a large ship comes into view. Singing can be heard as the sailors pull up their fishing nets.

_I'll tell you a tale of the bottomless blue_

_and it's hey to the starboard heave ho!_

_Look out lad, a mermaid be waiting for you_

_in the mysterious fathoms below._

Scott leans over the side of the ship and inhaled the sea air.

"Isn't this great? The salty sea air, the wind in your face." He inhales once more before sighing happily. "Perfect day to be at sea."

"Oh yes, delightful." a very green Jason says before clamping his hand over his mouth.

"Wow, great job with the make-up!" AnonGirl88 says from off stage.

"He didn't show up for make-up." Kitty says, also off stage.

Jason groans while Piotr comes up to them.

"A fine strong wind and a following sea! King Triton must be in a friendly type mood!" he says enthusiastically.

"King Triton?" Scott asks.

"Why, ruler of the Merpeople, lad!" Ray says, taking the trapped fish out of the net. "Thought every good sailor knew about him!"

"Hmph, merpeople." Jason says, wiping his mouth with a hankercheif. "Eric, pay no attention to this nautical nonsense."

"But it ain't nonsense, it's the truth!" Ray says, waving a fish in Jason's face, making him turn even greener.

"Ray, stop waving the fish around, I don't want to have to clean up any messes." AnonGirl88 yells from off stage.

"I'm telling you down in the depths of the ocean they live!" Ray adds, getting in Jason's face. Jason takes a step back and slips on a puddle of sea water. He and Ray both fall down, and the fish which Ray was holding slips out of his hand and lands safely in the ocean.

It looks up at the boat and gives a relieved sigh before swimming away. As the fish swims, various sea creatures appear, then mermaids and mermen swim. Slowly, a huge castle appears in the distance and gradually comes closer. The merpeople go inside and take their seats in an auditorium. Forge, as a sea horse, swims forward and clears his throat.

"His awesome grooviness, King Triton!" He announces.

"Forge, that was supposed to be Royal Highness!" AnonGirl88 yells. "Oh never mind, just keep going."

A giant sea shell carriage led by three dolphins arrives, driven by Hank. He uses his triton to light a huge chandelier, producing very pretty sparks in the process. Everyone in the audience applaudes, then Forge continues.

"And presenting the distinguished court composer, Horatio Felounious Ignatious Crustacious Sebastion!" he yells.

A tiny sea shell carriage led by two gold fish comes in, driven by Remy as a small crab. While he's waving to the crowd, his gold fish buck and he almost loses control. He manages to fix it though and drives along side Hank.

"I'm really looking forward to this performance, Sebastion." Hank says to him.

"Oh ho ho yo' majesty." Remy says, chuckling a little. "Dis will be de finest concert Remy have ever conducted. Yo' daughters, dey will be spectacular!" He holds on tighter as his gold fish buck again.

"Yes, and espeacially my little Ariel." Hank remarks as he parks his carriage in his balcony seat while Remy parks on the railing. The dolphins swim away as the carriages settle. Unfortuanatley, Remy's turns upside down.

"Oui, she has a most belle voice." Remy says as he struggles to turn his carriage right side up before driving down to the stage. "If only she would show up for rehearsals once in a while." he adds under his breath.

He parks on the conductors pedestal and pulls out a large rolled up paper and a conductors wand. He looks at the band, taps the baton before raising it. The band members get ready and begin playing when Remy starts to wave his baton around. Three giant clams appear on the stage. They open to show Kitty, Amara, Rogue, Amanda, Jubilee, and Tabby as mermaids, two to a shell. Remy instantly cat calls at Rogue, who is sitting with her arms folded, looking angry.

"Remy! Just wave the baton! You can flirt with Rogue later." AnonGirl88 yells from backstage again.

"No he can't!" Rogue yells.

"Just sing already, we're falling behind schedule." AnonGirl88 replies.

_Oh we are the daughters of Triton_

_Great father who loves us_

_and named us well._

The girls swim up out of their shells and sing a not after their name is called.

_Aquata!_

_Andrina!_

_Arista!_

_Atina_

_Adella_

_Alana!_

The girls then surround a fourth giant clam shell which is slowly rising out of the stage floor.

_And then ther is the youngest_

_in her musical debut!_

_Our seventh little sister_

_we're presenting her to you!_

_To sing a song Sebastion wrote,_

_her voice is like a bell!_

_She's our sister, Arie_-huh?

During the last line, the clam shell slowly opens up and reveals that it's empty. Remy looks extremly nervous, but Hank looks extremley aggitated.

"Ariel!" he exclaims angrilly.

The scene immeadiatly changes to show Jean at a sunken ship. Sam, as small yellow fish, struggles to catch up.

"Ariel, wait for me!" he says, slightly out of breath.

"Flounder, hurry up!" Jean says, looking back at him.

"You know ah can't swim that fast." Sam says when he finally catches up.

"There it is!" Jean says excitedly, pointing to another sunken ship. "Isn't it fantastic?"

"Yeah, yeah it's great." Sam replies, sounding nervous. "Now let's get out of here!"

"You're not getting cold fins now, are you?" Jean asks him before swimming over to it while carrying a bag.

"Who me? No way! It, uh, it looks damp in there, and, uh, ah think ahm comin' down with something. See, ah got this cough." Sam says, faking a cough as he follows her.

"Alright, I'm going in." Jean says while looking into the port hole of the ship. "You can stay out here and watch out for sharks."

"Okay." Sam whispers, nodding. "You go, an' ah'll watch ou- WHAT? SHARKS? ARIEL!" He double takes and rams into the port hole, but he gets stuck. "Dang all you can eat pizza night. Ariel, help!"

"Oh Flounder." Jean says, laughing slightley.

She grabs Sam by his fins and tugs.

"Ariel, do you really think there might be sharks here?" Sam asks fearfully, not seeing the giant shark swim by right behind him.

"Flounder, don't be such a guppy!" Jean admonishes him. Sam finally squeezes out with a slight pop.

"This is, uh, great, ah mean ah really, uh love this." He says, looking around apprehensivley. "Adventure, excitement, danger lurking around every-" Suddenly Sam sees the skeletal remains of a pirate and begins to scream and panic. He bumps into a wall, causing some of the ceailing to to fall onto him. "ARIEL! he screams, swimming over to Jean. She catches him and gets knocked back.

"Oh, are you okay?" she asks, very concerned.

"NO AH AM NOT OKAY!" Sam screams.

"Sam, do it right!" AnonGirl88 yells from off stage.

"Yeah, sure, ah'm okay." he says shivering.

"Shh." Jean says, looking up. She swims up to the scond deck and looks around before finding a fork. She immeadietley swims over to it. "Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Have you ever seen anything more wonderful in your entire life?" she asks Sam after grabbing the fork.

"Wow, cool! But, uh, what is it?" he asks.

"I don't know, but I bet Skuttle will!" she says, stuffing the fork into her bag. There is a growling noise in the background which Jean doesn't seem to hear as she swims off to look at other stuff, but Sam hears it.

"What was that?" he asks, obviously freaked out. "Did you hear something?"

"Hmm, I wonder what this is?" Jean says to herself, not listening to Sam.

"Ariel!"

"Flounder, will you relax?" Jean finally looks back at him, not noticing that Sabertooth the shark is looking in through the window. "Nothing is going to happen." Sam looks in her direction just as Sabertooth crashes through.

"AAGGHHHHHHHHHH! SHARK! SHARK! WE'RE GONNA DIE!" he screams as he and Jean swim away as fast as they can.

Sabertooth chases them around the sunken ship smashing and eating everything in his path. Jean's bag gets caught on a piece of wood and almost gets left behind. She goes back for it and grabs it less than an inch from Sabertooths jaws. She and Sam swim into the port hole they came in through. Once again, Sam gets stuck.

"Oh no, not again!" he yells, still panicking.

Jean pushes him through right before swimming through herself. Sabertooth crashes through and continues chasing them. Sam accidently slams into the mast and knocks himself silly. Jean quickly goess down to get him, then swims throught the ring on an old anchor. Sabertooth tries to follow, but ends up getting stuck. Sam manages to regain himself, and when he sees that the shark is trapped, he can't resist taunting him.

"You big bully!" he says before blowing a rasberry.

Sabertooth growls and snaps at him, so Sam screams and swims after Jean.

"Flounder, you really are a gupy." Jean says to him, laughing.

"Ah am not!" Sam retorts.

"And cut!" AnonGirl88 yells. "Okay, Forge, turn off the holograph machine." The holographs fade away, revealing that all the merpeople and talking fish are really people wearing SCUBA suits.

"Alright, that was excellent people! Same time tomorrow." she says from her submarine as everyone leaves. Almost everyone.

"HELP! I'M STUCK!" Sabertooth yells from his imprisonment, struggling to get out of the anchor ring.

"Fishy, get him out there, please?" AnonGirl88 says pinching the bridge of her nose. "And no biting his head off just because you get frustrated. You remember what happened last time."

"WHAT! KEEP THAT THING AWAY FROM ME!" Sabertooth manages to get out and swims away at a speed that would make Pietro jealous.

"Works every time." AnonGirl88 says with a huge grin.

* * *

There it is. The first chapter of my first parody. Reviews shall be taken by the cameraman/ muse, Fishy the purple and green shark. If you review, you will get a shout-out. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to go track down the next chapters cast, and a certain psychotic hottie! 


	2. Meeting more characters!

AN: And I'm back! I just want to apologise for the spelling errors in the first chapter. I promise that this time there will be a lot less, if any at all. I can't figure out why it's not showing the symbols though. Oh well. Well, here's chapter two! We finally meet Skuttle, Flotsam, and Jetsam!

* * *

Once again, AnonGirl88 is at the beach scene, but this time she's wide awake and is busy talking on a cell phone. Something she only does in dire, life or death situations.

"Are you sure you haven't found Pyro yet?" she asks the person she's talking to. "Have you checked the Acolyte base? And still nothing? Alright, no it's okay, I've got a pretty good idea where he might be." She hangs up and dials a diffrent number. "Fishy? Find the Dudes and chase them until the tell you what they did with Pyro this time, then call me back. Yes, you can bite them if you want. In fact, I insist." She hangs up, obviously very irratated. "I can not believe thi-" Suddenly her cell phone rings to the tune of Toccata and Fugue. "This had better be good. Hello? What? What do you mean I'm on again? Now is not a goo-" She looks at the camera and gives a huge, fake grin while tossing the cell phone away. "Hello! And welcome to chapter two of The Little Mermaid: Evolution. Well, what are we waiting for? Let's get this party started!"

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The scene changes to show a tiny island with a crows nest. Kurt the blue seagull is sitting in it playing with a telescope, humming happily to himself.

"Scuttle!" Jean calls, jogging him out of his euphoria.

"Vhoa!" Kurt jumps and looks through his telescope with his eye at the big end and sees Jean and Sam, who look like they're far away.

"Mermaid off ze port bound!" he yells.

The scene changes to show that Jean and Sam are actually just less than a foot away.

"Ariel, how you doing, kid!" he yells. He puts the telescope down and sees them. "Vhoah, vhat a swim."

"Scuttle, look what we found!" Jean says happily, dropping the bag on the little island.

"Yeah, there was this sunken ship, and this really creepy-" Sam starts, but is interrupted by Kurt.

"Human stuff, huh? Hey, let me see!" Kurt says before teleporting down from his perch.

"Kurt! No teleporting!" AnonGirl88 yells from backstage.

"Oops! Sorry, fraulien!" Kurt teleports back up and drops an anchor down which is attached to a rope that Kurts foot tangles up in, causing him to fall down. He waddles over, stepping on Sam's head in the process, and grabs the fork.

"Look at zis! Vow, zis is speacial, zis is very, very unusual."

"What? What is it?" Jean asks excitedly.

"It's a dingle hopper! Humans use zese little babies to straighten zeir hair out." Kurt says while bending the fork. He then begins to use it to comb his head feathers. "See, just a little yank here and a little twirl zere, and I got zee aesthetically pleasing configuration of hair zat ze ladies go nuts over." After twirling the fork around, the feathers poof up into a giant pom-pom.

"Hey, he was supposed to say 'that humans go nuts over', not ladies." Todd says.

"I know, I told him to switch it. Just a little present for all the Kurt fans out there." AnonGirl88 replies.

"Huh, a dingle hopper!" Jean says, astonished as she takes the fork.

"What about that one?" Sam asks, pointing to the pipe, which Kurt immeadiatley grabs.

"Zis, I haven't seen in years, zis is wunderbar! A banded, bulbous snarfblast!"

"Oooohhh!"

"Now ze snarfblast dates back to prehistoric times when humans used to sit around and stare at each other all day." he pauses for a minute to stare at Jean. "Zat's very boring. So zey invented zis snarfblast to make fine music. Allow me."

Kurt blows into it as hard as he can, bringing up a bunch of bubbles and sea weed. While he's coughing and choking, Jean smacks her forehead.

"Music!"

"It's stuck!" Kurt chokes and spits out some sand.

"Oh the concert! Oh my gosh, my father's going to kill me!" Jean says, ignoring Kurt and stuffing the stuff back into her bag.

"The concert was today!" Sam says. "Hang on." He whips out a speacial waterproof PDA and looks through it. "Yep, four o'clock, concert."

"Maybe you could make a little planter out of it or something." Kurt says right before Jean snatches the pipe away.

"I'm sorry, I've got to go! Thank you Scuttle!" Jean says before swimming away with Sam close behind.

"Any time, liebchien. Any time." Kurt waves.

Jean and Sam swim past a big pile of rocks, under which Lance and Pietro the eels are hiding.

"Why do I have to be one the stupid eels?" Lance complains.

"Well I was going to have Toad do it, but then I realised that the eels have to be at least somewhat charming." AnonGirl88 says.

"Hey, I'm charming!" Toad says. "Ain't that right, cuddlebumps?" he immeadiatley begins hitting on Wanda.

"GET AWAY FROM ME YOU SLIMY LITTLE FREAK!" Wanda screams, shooting hex bolts at him.

"Wanda, don't beat him up to badly. We're going to need him later on in the story." AnonGirl88 says. "Continue!"

Lance's left eye and Pietro's right eye start glowing yellow and show Jean and Sam swimming. The eyes slowly meld together while changing from yellow to white, turning into one orb.

"Yes, hurry home Princess." Agatha says. "We wouldn't want to miss Daddy's little celebration, now would we? Ha. Celebration indeed, bah! In my day, we had fantastical feasts! When I lived in the palace."

She grabs a little shrimp from a bucket and pops it into her mouth before climbing out of her little cave nook.

"And now look at me. Wasting away to practically nothing. Banished and exiled and practically starving, while he and his flimsy fish folk celebrate. Well, I'm going to give them something to celebrate! Flotsam! Jetsam!" she yells the last two words. Lance and Pietro both smack their heads on the rock above them at their names.

"OW!" they both yell, clutching their heads with their tails.

"Lance! Pietro was the only one who was supposed to smack his head, not you!" AnonGirl88 says.

"Oh don't do me any favors!" Pietro yells.

"Okay, I won't." AnonGirl88 calls back.

"Like I hit my head on purpose." Lance grumbles.

"Just keep going, we're almost done." AnonGirl88 says.

"I want you to keep an eye on that pretty little daughter of his." Agatha says.

Lance and Pietro smile slyly before swimming away.

"She may be the key to Tritons undoing." Agatha says in a sinister fashion before the screen fades out.

"And cut! That's it for today, folks! See you all tomorrow!" AnonGirl88 says, propelling her miniature submarine around.

Once again, her cell phone, which has magically re-appeared from out of no where, goes off. She quickly answers it.

"Hello? Fishy! Good, I was starting to get worried. What? What do you mean you can't find the Dudes? Argh, figures that they decide to leave the one time I find a use for them. No, don't worry about it, you just work on that top secret project I told you about. Okay, bye." she hangs up and drives away.

* * *

Well, that's chapter two for you.

Shout outs!

Prophet-Song: Thanks. Lol, sorry I didn't make Magneto Ursula, but I'm sure I can come up with something just as funny for old Bucket Head.

animejunkie1008: See, I'm working on that! Slowly but surely! And you were right, it is Scuttle, not Skuttle.

Readerrr Grrrl: Thanks so much! Hope this was soon enough for you!

Lil Jean: Thank you! Glad you like it! I haven't seen anyone do The Little Mermaid either!

todd fan: I'm glad to hear you're enjoying it!


	3. Part of Your World

AN:Well, here's chapter 3. Not a whole lot to say.

* * *

The scene shows AnonGirl88 sitting casually in a directors chair wearing a complete directors outfit: white shirt, dark blue blazer and buisness pants, dress shoes, sunglasses, beret, and a megaphone to her right. Which looks extremley strange because she's on the beach right in front of the ocean.

"Hello! And welcome to the third chapter of the parody The Little Mermaid: Evolution. I am your host, director, and producer, AnonGirl88." she says in a dignified voice that sounds really creepy coming from her.

"This is the third chapter, moron! Everyone already knows who you are!" Someone yells from backstage.

"Shut up, Other Dude! You're lucky I had to send Fishy on that top secret mission!" AnonGirl88 screams through her megaphone. She then clears her throat and smiles for the camera. "Anyway, thank you so much for joi-" she is interrupted when her cell phone goes off, this time to the tune 'Funky Town'. She glares at it, then smiles a big, phoney smile before turning her chair around so that her back is to the camera.

"Whoever this is, you had better have a really good reason for calling me no- what? I see. Thank you." she hangs up her cell phone and turns back to the camera. "Due to events beyond our control, I will not be here for the remainder of the chapter. Instead," she pulls out her clip board. "Uh, Ray will be the substitute director. Now if you'll excuse me." she rips off her directors outfit and reveals her original outfit, then runs away like the insane maniac that she is.

"Hey, get back here! You can't just leave before the story has even started!" Mr. L, the leprechaun yells, chasing after her.

"Okay, you heard her, I'm in charge!" Ray appears. He sits down in the chair and grabs the megaphone. "ACTION!"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sam the yellow fish is waiting outside the throne room while Hank lectures Jean.

"Oh I just don't know what to do with you, young lady!" he says, sounding dismayed.

"Daddy, I'm sorry, I completley forgot!" Jean says.

"As a result of your careless behavior-" Hank begins until Remy buts in.

"Careless and reckless behavior!"

"The entire celebration was-"

"Well it was ruined!" Remy interrupts. "Dat's all, completley destroyed! Dis concert was to be de pinnacle of Remy's career, now thanks to you Remy's de laughing stock of de entire kingdom!"

"But it wasn't her fault!" Sam says, finally swimming in to defend Jean by getting in Remy's face. But his moment of bravery is short lived and he falters under Hank and Remy's stares.

"See, uh, this shark came, yeah, uh, yeah! And we tried to, but we couldn't! And, and, grrrrrr. And then he was like, whoah! And we were like, whoah! And then he was-"

"Cut, cut, cut, cut, CUT!" Ray yells from off-stage. "That last line was from Finding Nemo!"

"Oops, sorry." Sam says. "Aah, and then we were safe. Then this blue seagull came and he was all 'This is this' and 'That is that,"

"What? Seagull?" Hank says, startled out of his previous boredom. Sam clamps his fins over his mouth while Hank starts to get angry.

"You went up to the surface again, didn't you! Didn't you!"

"Nothing happened." Jean says sheepishly.

"Ariel, how many times must we be through this? You could have been seen by one of those barbarians, by one of those, those humans!" Hank says.

"Daddy, they're not barbarians!" Jean snaps.

"Duncan is!" Scott says from off stage.

"Yeah, and so is Principal Kelly!" Freddy adds.

"Quiet on the set!" Ray yells.

"They're dangerous!" Hank says, trying to ignore the interruptions. "Do you think I want to see my youngest daughter snared by some fish eaters hook?"

"I'm sixteen years old. Actually I'm seventeen. I'm not a child anymore!"

"Don't you take that tone withe me! As long as you live under my ocean, you will obey my rules!"

"Wait, if she's a mermaid, and her pops rules the whole entire ocean, where else is she supposed to go?" Toad asks.

"How should I know?" Ray asks. "I'm just the substitute director. Ask the author when she gets back."

"But if you would just listen!" Jean says.

"Not another word! And I am never, never to hear of you going to the surface again! Is that clear!" Hank yells. Jean glares at him, then swims away crying, with Sam right behind her. Hank sinks down into his throne, exhausted.

"Hmph. Teenagers. Dey t'ing dey know everyt'ing." Remy comments. "You give dem an inch, dey swim all over you."

"Do you think I, I was too hard on her?" Hank asks him.

"Definetley not! Why, if Ariel was Remy's daughter, he'd show her who was boss. None of dis flitting to de surface and other such nonsense. No sir, Remy'd keep her under tight control."

"You're absoulutley right, Sebastion!" Hank says.

"Of course." Remy replies.

"Ariel needs constant supervision."

"Constant."

"Someone to watch over her, to keep her out of trouble!"

"All de time."

"And you are just the crab to do it!" Hank pokes Remy in the chest. Remy stares at him open mouth, the slowly swims away. When he's out of hearing range, he starts to mutter to himself.

"How does Remy get himself into dese messes? He should be writing symphonies, not chase after head strong teenagers."

"Why not, that's how you spend every waking hour!" Bobby yells from backstage.

Jean and Sam swim by slowly, looking around to make sure that they aren't being followed. Remy notices and immeadiatley becomes suspicous.

"Hmm? What is dat fille up to?" he asks himself.

He follows them as they swim far, far, far away from the palace. Remy stops on a rock to catch his breath and sees Jean push a large rock away from the entrance to a cave, which she and Sam swim into. Remy manages to follow un-noticed, but he ends up getting his legs caught in the door. He wrenches himself free but the momentum sends him straight into a wall.

Rubbing his head, he looks around the grotto and is amazed to see that it is filled with all kinds of human junk: barrels, jewelry boxes, broken mugs, a dozen or so Furbies, and other stuff.

"Ariel, are you okay?" Sam asks Jean.

"If only I could make him understand. I just don't see how people who make such wonderful things could be bad."

"_Look at this stuff,_

_Isn't it neat?_

_Wouldn't you think my collection's complete?_

_Wouldn't you think I'm the girl, _

_The girl who has everything?_

_Look at this trove,_

_Treasures untold._

_How many wonders can one cavern hold?_

_Looking around here you'd think_

_Sure. She's got everything._

_I've got gadgets and gizmos aplenty._

_I've got whosits and whatsits galore._

You want thingamabobs? I've got twenty!

_But who cares?_

_No big deal._

_I want more._

_I want to be where the people are._

_I want to see, want to see them dancing._

_Walking around on those, what do you call them?_

Oh, feet.

_Flipping your fins you don't get too far._

_Legs are required for dancing, _

_strolling along down a, _what's that word again?

_Street._

_Up where they walk,_

_Up where they run,_

_Up where they stay all day in the sun,_

_Wandering free,_

_Wish I could be,_

_Part of that world!_

_What would I give,_

_If I could live _

_out of these waters?_

_What would I pay_

_To spend the day_

_Warm on the sand?_

_Betcha on land,_

_They understand._

_Bet they don't reprimend their daughters._

_Bright young women._

_Sick of swimming._

_Ready to stand!_

_And ready to know what the people know!_

_Ask them my questions _

_And get some answers!_

_What's a fire? And why does it,_

_What's the word? Burn?_

_When's it my turn?_

_Wouldn't I love?_

_Love to explore that shore above_

_Out of the sea._

_Wish I could be._

_Part of that world._"

"Okay, send in the stunt double!" Ray yells. Bobby stomps in, wearing several layers of protective padding.

"Remind me again why I'm the stunt double?" Bobby asks, his speech muffled by the foam.

"Because you're an idiot. I told you not to slip that spider ice cube down her back!"

"But it was so funny!"

"Yeah, but she didn't think so, which is why you're the stunt double." Ray says, pushing Bobby inside a glass bottomed mug.

The mug rolls down and crashes into a pile of junk, starteling Jean and Sam.

"Okay, stunt double out." Ray yells. Bobby stumbles out of the mug, his padding torn and Remy comes in.

"Sebastion!" Jean says. Remy is wearing a diamond ring around is neck and a tea cup on his back, has a pipe in his mouth, two of his legs are stuck in a thimble, and he is sitting on top of a tiny accordion. He spits the pipe out and starts to angrily rip the things off.

"Ariel, how could you, what is all dis?" he demands.

"It's, uh, it's my collection." Jean says, nervously playing with her hair.

"Oh, I see. Yo' collection, hmm." Remy says calmly before freaking out. "IF YO' FATHER KNEW ABOUT DIS"

"You're not going to tell, are you?" Sam asks, panicking.

"Oh please Sebastion, he would never understand." Jean begs.

"Ariel, you are under a lot of pressure." Remy says. "Come with me, Remy'll take you home and get you something warm to drink."

"How would that work if they're underwater?" Toad asks.

"Uh, ask AnonGirl88 when she gets back." Ray says.

Suddenly a large shadow looms overhead. Jean swims up to investegate.

"What do you suppose?" Jean asks, mostly to herself.

"Ariel?" Remy asks as he and Sam follow her.

"Cut!" AnonGirl88 yells, dragging behind her a struggling Pyro who's bound and gagged.

"De fille finally got you, huh mon ami?" Remy chuckles. Pyro and AnonGirl88 glare at him, making him quiet down.

"So, how'd everything go?" AnonGirl88 asks, hugging Pyro.

"Great. Fantastic, even." Ray says.

"Good. So we'll see you all tomorrow then!" AnonGirl88 says before dragging Pyro away.

* * *

See, I always get my man. Whether he likes it or not! Lol. Believe it or not, I am not some psychotic rabid fan girl, I had a very good, legitimate reason for kidnapping Pyro! Of course, I still plan on keeping him: that's where the psyco rabid fan girl thing comes in.

SHOUT-OUTS!

todd fan: Glad you like it!

Rogue14: Hope this was soon enough!

Violet Aura: I'm happy to see hear that you're enjoying it!

Lil Jean: Scott is playing the part of Prince Eric. I know exactly what you mean, there are plenty of movies that I own that I haven't seen in a really long time. Glad you're enjoying it!

Well, that's pretty much it. Please, please, please, please, please, please, please please REVIEW!


	4. Love at First Sight aka EXPLOSIONS!

AN: Well, here's chapter four. I would just like to say that the reason these updates are so close together is because I wrote this story about a year ago on paper but I just barely got an account here. For future refrences: try not to get used to it. Also, I only update when I get at the very least 2 reviews per chapter. That way, I know people are still reading it. See, I'm not greedy like some authors who don't update until they get 50 reviews. No one in particular, I just made that up off the top of my head.

* * *

AnonGirl88 and Pyro are on the beach sitting in directors chairs, far, far, far, far, far, far, far away from the ocean. Pyro has shackles on his legs to prevent him from escaping, but other wise looks pretty happy.

"Greetings! And welcome to the fourth chapter of The Little Mermaid: Evolution." AnonGirl88 says in her phony directors voice.

"I'm Pyro, your new co-director, and the insane sheila's the director, AnonGirl88." Pyro adds.

"Hey, how'd she get him to agree to that?" Bobby asks.

"Easy. She told him that he's in charge of the first part of this chapter, then she bribed him with a new lighter." Lance replies.

"Quiet on the set!" AnonGirl88 yells through her megaphone. "Alright, lights, camera, ACTION!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jean and Sam break the surface and see a huge ship shooting off lots of big, sparkly fireworks. Remy surfaces soon after.

"Ariel, what are you- JUMPIN' JELLYFISH!" he exclaims when he sees the fireworks. Jean swims closer to the ship, with Sam right behind her. "Ariel! Ariel please! Come back!" he yells.

Jean ignores him and continues to swim until she's right next to the ship. she then climbs up and watches the sailors, who are all either dancing or playing various instruments. Roberto, as a dog, is dancing to the music.

"Why the heck am I the stupid dog?" he whines.

"Because Mystique threatened to turn into a giant spider if I cast her as the dog, and Rahne threatened to bite me. Besides, Max is a boy." AnonGirl88 says.

"That doesn't explain why you picked me to be the dog." Roberto argues.

"Sure it does. I'm the director. Now stop stalling!" AnonGirl88 yells.

"Fine." Roberto continues to dance and bark.

He then stops dancing and sniffs the air. He makes his way over to where Jean. She hides for a minute, then when she looks, Roberto is standing there panting. He licks Jeans face then bounds off when Scott calls.

"Max! Here boy!" Scott kneels down and ruffles Roberto's ears. "Hey mutt, whatcha doing? Good boy, good boy."

Jean sighs when she sees him and gets a dreamy, glazed over look in her eyes. Suddenly Kurt flies down.

"Hiya, fraulien! Quite a show, eh?" he yells. Jean swats at him.

"Scuttle be quiet, they'll hear you!" she whispers.

"Oh, I gottcha, I gottcha." Kurt says before hiding, looking around sneakily. "We're under investigation. WE'RE OUT TO DISCOVER!" He shouts. Jean quickly grabs his beak and holds it shut.

"Shh! I've never seen a human this close before." she says while staring at Scott. "He's very handsome, isn't he?"

"I don't know, he looks kind of hairy and slobbery." Kurt says while looking at Roberto. "Although he looked that way before the hologram was added."

"Not that one!" Jean grabs his head and turns it to look at Scott. "The one playing the snarfblast!"

"Silence, silence!" Jason yells. "It is now my honor and privelage to present Prince Eric with this very ugly, very cheap, and very large present that we got from the dollar store." he indicates a large object covered by a tarp.

"Jason! I told you to follow the script!" AnonGirl88 yells. Jason ignores her.

"Ah, Grimsby, you old bean pole, you shouldn't have!" Scott says, lightly punching Jason in the arm.

"I know." Jason replies before pulling the tarp away, revealing an extremley tacky statue of Scott standing in some corny, heroic pose: complete with corny armor. Roberto growls at it.

"Gee, Grim, it's uh, it's really something." Scott says uneasily.

"Yes, I commisioned it myself. Of course I had hoped it would be a wedding present." Jason says.

"Oh come on! Look, you're not still peeved 'cause I didn't fall for the princess of Gloerhaven, are you?" Scott replies.

"Oh Eric it isn't me alone. The entire Kingdom wants to see you happily settled down with the right girl!"

"Well she's out there somewhere. I just haven't found her."

"Yes, well perhaps you just haven't been looking hard enough."

"Believe me, Grimm, when I find her I'll know, without a doubt. It'll just, BAM, hit me! Like lightning" Upon making that last little comment, lightning flashes.

"See what you did, Summers!"Lance yells from off stage.

"Hurricane 'a comin'!"Piotr yells. "Stand fast, secure the rigging!"

The entire crew panics and runs around screaming before finally having enough sense to get to the life boats. But when Jason jumps down he misses and ends up floundering around in the water. Scott sees him and tosses him a life preserver.

"OW!" Jason yells when something small smacks him in the head.

"Scott, the script says life preserver, not a packet of Life Savers!" AnonGirl88 yells

"Fine." Scott tosses him a real life preserver, which he grabs. Lightning strikes the mast of the ship, causing it to catch on fire. Roberto starts to bark because he's now trapped behind the flamming debris.

"Max!" Scott yells when he sees this. He tries to run over to him, but is stopped by the fire. He finds a way over, picks him up, then tosses him overboard into one of the life boats. The wind grows so strong that Jean has to grab hold of one ot the ropes to avoid being blown away. Kurt tries to do the same, but it proves difficult.

"Vhoah! Ze wind's picking up! AAAAAAAHHHHH!" Despite his efforts, Kurt is blown away. "Ariel!"

Jean is blown into the water. She quickly resurfaces and watches the flaming ship. The wind blows the fire towards some explosive materials and the ship explodes!

"YAY! Burn, baby! Burn!" AnonGirl88 and Pyro cheer.

"Now who's interrupting?" Bobby mutters.

Jean dives underwater and swims toward the unconcious Scott, grabs him, then drags him back up to the surface and swims to the beach. By the time she gets there, the storm has already passed. Kurt and Jean look at the still form of Scott.

"Is he, dead?" Jean asks.

"It's hard to say." Kurt grabs Scotts hand and holds it up to his ear. "I can't make out a heart beat."

"I thought Kurt was supposed to check for a pulse from his foot." Ray says.

"I changed it. And I'm the director, so expect a whole lotmore changes in the future." AnonGirl88 snaps. "Continue."

"No look! He's breathing!" Jean says when she notices that Scott is indeed breathing. "He's so beautiful." she quietly comments before putting his sunglasses back on, which fell off in the explosion. She then starts to sing quietly.

"_What would I give_

_To live where you live?_

_What would I pay,_

_To stay here beside you?_

_What would I do to see you,_

_smiling at me?_

_Where would we walk?_

_Where would we run?_

_If we could stay all day in the sun_

_Just you and me,_

_And I could be, _

_Part of your world."_

About half way through the song, Remy comes up and sees them together. His jaw drops down in his shock, but Kurt closes it for him before any sand can get in. Near the end, Scott opens his eyes and sees Jean singing to him. She hears Jason calling for him and quickly dives into the water before they can see her and her mermaid-ness.

"Eric!" Jason comes over and helps him up.

"No throwing him in the ocean this time like you did in rehearsals Master Mind." AnonGirl88 yells.

"You really enjoy these sadistic strains on my blood pressure, don't you boy?" Jason says, ignoring the director. "And don't answer that."

"A girl, rescued me." Scott says, still in a daze. "She had the most beautiful voice!"

"Uh, Eric, I think you've swallowed a little too much sea water. Off we go." Jason helps Scott back to the castle, while Roberto the dog barks. "Come on Max."

Meanwhile, Jean, Sam, and Remy are watching them from a distance. While Jean is staring at the retreating form of Scott, Remy is talking to Sam.

"We just gonna forget dis whole t'ing ever happened. De sea king will never know! You won't tell him, Remy won't tell him. Dat way, Remy will stay in one piece." Neither of them notice that Jean, who's sitting on a rock, is quietly starting to sing again.

"_I don't know when._

_I don't know how._

_But I know something's starting right now!_

_Just wait and see._

_Someday I'll be._

_Part of your world!"_

While she is singing, a small blue furry creature that resembles an evil koala with antena and two arms comes up behind her on a surf board, riding the wave. The wave dies right over Jean, causing her to be soaked.

"Cut, cut, cut, cut, CUT!" AnonGirl88 yells, coming onto the set. She glares at the strange little creature, who is calmly floating on his surf board. "Stitch, wrong story. This isn't Hawaii." Stitch mutters something in alien and presses a button on his surf board, turning it into a space ship. As he's flying away, he yells something at AnonGirl88. "Oh yeah? Well same to you, buddy!" She yells before stomping off the set.

Meanwhile, Agatha is watching all of this through her orb.

"Oh no, no, no. I can't stand it, it's too easy!" she says, laughing evilly. "The child is in love with a human! And not just any human, a PRINCE! Her daddy will just love that. King Triton's head strong, love sick girl would make a lovely addition to my little garden." she says while looking at a garden full of creepy little plants with giant eyeballs, who all tremble fearfully as Agatha laughs the official evil villian/villianess laugh.

"And cut! That's it for today. Everybody go home and rest up. We start the next chapter the second Fishy gets back with the top secret surprise." AnonGirl88 yells. Pietro zooms in.

"Whywasn'tIinthischapter?" he demands.

"Slower, ego boy." AnonGirl88 says while flipping through her papers.

"I said why wasn't I in this chapter?" he repeats.

"Because you're one of the eels and the eels were not in this chapter." she states plainly.

"But you're the director, can't you change it so I'm in every chapter?" he whines. AnonGirl88 thinks for a minute, then grins evilly at Pietro, making him very nervous. "Uh, whyareyoulookingatmelikethat?"

"You know Pietro, I am in the plotting process of doing another parody after this one, maybe, oh I don't know, Ice Age? And I think you'd make the perfect Sid the Sloth."

"YOUWOULDN'TDARE!"

"You keep complaining and I would dare! But if you behave for the entire parody, and I'm still interested in the afore mentioned idea, I just might give you a decent part. Got it?"

"Gotit!" Pietro quickly runs away, lest he suffer the authors wrath.

"You were just joking about that Ice Age parody idea, right sheila?" Pyro asks nervously.

"Yes and no. It was the first thing that came to my head, but now that I think about it..." AnonGirl88 trails off, tapping her chin thoughtfully.

"Oh no, and people think **I'M** insane!" he exclaims.

"Come on." AnonGirl88 says while dragging Pyro away.

* * *

Well, that's the end.

SHOUT-OUTS!

psychobunny410: Glad you're enjoying it! Well, the original plan was to have Toad be the stunt double, but while I was typing, Bobby annoyed me, so he became the stunt double for that stunt. Lol. As for Pyro, I do have a special part for him, but that's not till much later.

RogueFanKC: You are very right. And I am extremly proud that I'm crazy, because normal people are scary. And Pyro will be fine! I just have to supply him with lot's of stuff to burn.


	5. Under de sea!

AN: Here's chapter five. The insanity continues. Speaking of insanity, I just want to clear something up. I am not joking around when I say that I really do act like during a sugar rush: I get very hyper and perky, and, well, you'll see what I mean as you continue reading.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The scene begins at the usual beach, but this time the castle is visible in the background. Everything is calm for a moment, then AnonGirl88 and Pyro stumble into view.

"Alright, alright, we're going!" AnonGirl88 yells. She and Pyro grin at the camera, but instead of their usual phony grin, it's an insane grin often seen in people who have had **_WAY_** too much sugar.

"Hello! And welcome to the fifth chapter of The Little Mermaid: Evolution. I am AnonGirl88, the director."

"And I am Pyro, the co-director."

"Today, we have an extra special treat for all of you Remy LeBeau fans. The Ragin' Cajun is going to be si-" Suddenly she and Pyro burst out laughing.

"Will you two knock it off an just start the chapter already?" Lance yells from backstage.

"Ignore Lance, he's still mad at Pyro and Toad for stealing his Jeep." AnonGirl88 giggles, then she looks confused. "Wait, how come I'm not still mad at the two of you for leaving the set and not inviting me?" she asks Pyro.

"Because we gave you the rest of the Pixie Stix and Cola, then got those big pink sugar cookies." Pyro replies.

"Oh. That's a good reason." she says happily.

"We're doomed. We've got two hyped up pyromaniacs in charge." Bobby groans.

"I am so glad that todays entire chapter is underwater." Sam adds.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kitty, Amara, Rogue, Amanda, Jubilee and Tabby are all preening in front of mirrors.

"Hey Roguey, you make a tres belle mermaid, chere!" Remy catcalls from backstage.

"Knock it off, Gambit, or we'll send you to back up to the beach to watch AnonGirl88, Pyro and Toad." Lance says.

"Dat's cruel and unusual punishment!" Remy exclaims. The sounds of insane cackling by AnonGirl88, Pyro, and Toad can be heard off stage. "Remy don't like de sound o' dat."

"No one does. But I'm not going to risk my skin to check on those maniacs." Lance replies.

"And I thought thoselittle pink alienswere bad. These three on sugar rush are even worse!" Scott groans.

"Ariel, dear! Time to come out!" Amara calls through a door, trying to ignore the boys.

"You've been in there all morning!" Tabby yells.

Jean finally swims out with a glazed look on her face, humming to herself. She goes up to one of the mirrors and fixes her hir, then takes a flower before swimming off. She's so far gone in her little world that she bumps into Hank.

"Oh! Morning Daddy!" She giggles, tucking the flower into his hair before swimming off again, now singing quietly to herself as she does several flips. Hank and the girls stare at her for a few minutes, bewildered.

"She's got it bad." Jubilee says.

"Totally." Kitty agrees.

"What? What has she got?" Hank asks, confused.

"Isn't it obvious Daddy?" Amanda says. "Ariels in love."

"Ariel, in love?" Hank says to himself, examining the flower.

Meanwhile, Remy is nervously pacing back and forth muttering to himself, occaisionally blowing away one of the falling petals that land on his face.

"Okay, so far, so good. Remy don't t'ing de king knows." he blows away another petal. "But it will not be easy to keep dis a secret for long." Meanwhile, Jean is plucking the petals off of a flower.

"He loves me. Hmm, he loves me not. He loves me!" she giggles after the last petal has been plucked. "I knew it!"

"Ariel! Stop talking crazy talk!" Remy says.

"I've got to see him again! Tonight" Jean says, not listening. "Scuttle knows where he lives." she swims off of the rock she was on and Remy quickly grabs her tail.

"Ariel, please! Will you get yo' head out of de clouds an' back in de water where it belongs?" Remy says.

"I'll swim up to his castle, then Flounder will splash around to get his attention."

"Down here is yo' home!" Remy swims up in her face. "Ariel, listen to Remy, de human world, it's a mess. Life under de sea is better den anyt'ing dey got up dere." He makes her sit back down and starts to sing.

"_De sea weed is always greener_

_In somebody elses lake._

_You dream about going up dere,_

_But dat is a big mistake._

_Just look at the world around you_

_Right here on de ocean floor._

_Such wonderful t'ings around you,_

_What more is you lookin for?!_

Suddenly a bunch of fish come in and dance around Jean to the music

"_Under de sea!_

_Under de sea!_

_Darlin' it's better_

_Down where it's wetter,_

_Take it from me!_

_Up on the shore dey work all day_

_Out in de sun dey slave away._

_While we're devotin'_

_Full time to floatin'_

_Under de sea!"_

Remy then joins Bobby the blue lobster on a set of drums and they sing together.

_"Down here all de fish is happy_

_As off t'rough de waves dey roll!_

_De fish on de land ain't happy_

_'Cause dat's cause dey in de bowl!"_

Magneto as a big fish is trapped in a big bubble.

"_But fish in de bowl is lucky,_

_Dey in for a worser fate._

_One day when de boss get hungry,"_

_"Guess who gonna be on de plate." _Magneto sings in monotone baritone.

"_What, no!_

_Under de sea!_

_Under de sea!_

_Nobody beat us, fry us, and eat us_

_In fricas'e!_

_We what de land folks love to cook!_

_Under de sea we off de hook._

_We go no troubles_

_Life is de bubbles!_

_Under de sea!"_

_Under de sea! _A bunch of tiny little fish begin to sing back-up.

_Under de sea!_

_Under de sea!_

_Since life is sweet here_

_We got de beat here_

_Naturally._

_"Naturallee-ee-ee-ee!" _

_"Even de sturgeon and de ray_

_Dey get de urge an start to play!_

_We got de spirit_

_You've got to hear it_

_Under de sea!_

Various sea creatures get some camera time as they play various instruments.

"_De newt play de flute_

_De carp play de harp_

_De plaice play de bass_

_An dey soundin' sharp._

_De bass play de brass_

_De chub play de tub_

_De fluke is de duke of soul."_

_"Yeah."_

_"De ray he can play_

_De lings on de strings_

_De trout racking out_

_De black fish she sings_

_De smelt and de sprat_

_Dey know where it's at,_

_An oh dat blow fish blows!"_

During the instrumental, Sam comes in and swims through the crowd to Jean, then whispers something in her ear. She smiles and the two swim away, un-noticed. Remy and the fish continue to sing.

_"Under de sea!_

_Under de sea!_

_Under de sea!_

_Under de sea!_

_When de sardine begin in de beguine_

_It's music to me!_

_Music to me!'_

_What do dey got, alot of sand?_

_We got our owh crustaician band._

_Each little clam here_

_Know how to jam here_

_Under de sea!_

_Each little slug here_

_Cutting a rug here _

_Under de sea!_

_Each little snail here_

_know how to wail here_

_Dat's cause it's hotter_

_Under de water_

_We in de luck here_

_Under de muck here_

_Unde de sea!"_

All the fish point to the rock where Jean was, but when they see that she's not there, they swim away.

"Ariel? Oh, somebody's got to nail dat filles fins to de floor." Remy comments to no one in particular.

"Sebastion!" Forge yells, swimming over to him. "Sebastion, I've been looking for you everywhere. King Triton -"

"De sea king?" Remy asks nervously. Forge begins tugging on one of Remy's claws.

"He wants to see you right away! Something about Ariel."

"He knows!" Remy gasps, now terrified out of his mind.

"And cut! Yes, it's finally over!" AnonGirl88 yells.

"Let's go burn down Principal Kelly's house!" Pyro says gleefully.

"Then Duncan's car!" Toad adds.

"I like the way you think, Todd." AnonGirl88 says. The three hyper-active teenagers run off.

"Oh great, with our luck they'll probably turn Toad into one of them." Lance grumbles. "Just what we need, another pyromaniac."

"Either that or Toad's going to turn them into kleptomaniacs." Pietro adds.

"Why do you say that?" Lance asks.

"Because they're stealing your Jeep again." Pietro says.

"What?! HEY! GET BACK HERE WITH MY CAR!!!" Lance screams, running after them.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The end. Will Pyro and AnonGirl88 turn Toad into a pyromaniac? Will Toad turn Pyro and AnonGirl88 into kleptomaniacs? Will Lance ever learn not to leave his Jeep unattended? Who knows? For anyone who's confused, read Living La Vida Locka,Thanks to Pixie Stix.

SHOUT-OUTS!!

Readerr Grrrl: I agree with you there, normal people are scary. How the heck do they ever have any fun if they're normal?

todd fan: Glad to hear that!

psychobunny410: I thought it was funny too! That sucks. What's so bad about script format? In my opinion it's alot easier when when writing parodies, espeacially when you're trying to write it while watching the movie.


	6. Poor Unfortunate Souls

Chapter 6. Sorry this took so long, holidays take a lot of work. To make up for it, I made this chapter extra long.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scott wheels in AnonGirl88, who has been confined to a straight-jacket and one of those wheel things used to haul around boxes and crazy people.

"Hey, let me out of this thing!" she yells, struggling as much as possible. "The sugar and caffeine are completley out of my system, so you can let me go!"

"Just say your lines." Scott says, depositing her in front of the camera.

"Fine. Hello, welcome to the sixth chapter of The Little Mermaid: Evolution. I am your director, AnonGirl88, and I hope you enjoy todays scene." she says in monotone before glaring at Scott. "If I ever make a Shrek parody, I'm making you Lord Farquad." she scowls.

"Nice try, but I'm not falling for it." he replies while wheeling her back off the set.

"And you wonder why nobody likes you." AnonGirl88 snaps.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hank is sitting in his throne, twirling the flower Jean gave him earlier.

"Oh, who could the lucky merman be?" he laughs to himself. Remy sneaks in and hides in the doorway. Hank notices and quickly hides the flower. "Oh, er, come in, Sebastion."

Remy swallows a huge lump in his throat and gives himself a little pep talk.

"Okay, no matter what happens, Remy's got to remain calm." he mutters before calmly walking up to the throne. "Yes?" he squeaks.

"Oh yeah, real smooth, Cajun!" Lance yells.

Remy glares at him then clears his throat.

"Yes, yo' Majesty?" he says calmly.

"Sebastion, I'm concerned about Ariel. Have you noticed anything peculiar?" Hank asks.

"Hmm, peculiar?" Remy parrots.

"You know, swimming around day dreaming, singing to herself? You hadn't noticed?" Hank says suspiciously.

"Oh, well, I, er, uh." Remy stutters.

"Sebastion." Hank motions to Remy to come closer, so Remy swims up to the arm of the throne. "I know you've been keeping something from me."

"Keeping something?" Remy repeats, getting very nervous.

"About Ariel." Hank prods.

"Ariel?" Remy gulps, starting to sweat.

"Is there an echo in here or what?" Pyro yells from backstage, also in a straight jacket like AnonGirl88.

"Is there an echo in here or what?"

"Oops, sorry!" Forge says. He adjusts the sound.

"In love, hmm?" Hanks prods with both voice and trident.

"Send in the stunt double!" AnonGirl88 yells from backstage. Todd walks in.

"Whoa, why does Remy need a stunt double?" Remy asks.

"Because when we did this scene in rehearsals, you couldn't even pretend to have a panic attack, remember?" AnonGirl88 says. "Where as Toad is the worlds best panicking person."

"Hey thanks!" Toad says, preening a little.

"That's just a nice way of calling you a coward." Pietro says.

"Quiet you, or I'll duck tape you to the ceiling and use you for a speed bag." AnonGirl88 says. Pietro yelps and runs off.

Todd and Remy switch places, and Todd immeadiatly starts to hyperventilate and soon looses it.

"I tried to stop her Sire! She wouldn't listen! I told her to stay away from humans! They are bad! They are trouble!" sobs Toad.

"Humans? WHAT ABOUT HUMANS?!" Hank bellows.

"Humans?" Toad laughs nervously. "Who said anything about humans?" he laughs nervously. Hank grabs him and the scene changes to Sam swimming in front of Jean.

"Flounder, why can't you just tell me where we're going?" she asks. They swim into her secret grotto.

"You'll see, it's a surprise!" Sam says. There in the middle of the room is the tacky statue of Scott. Jean gasps when she sees it and immeadiatley swims over to it.

"Oh my gosh!" she hugs Sam. "Flounder you're the best! It looks just like him! It even has his sunglasses!" she giggles and starts to flirt and hang on the statue. "Why Eric, run away with you? This is all so, so sudden!"

"Oh sure, Jean flirts with a cheap statue of Scott, nobody says a word. I name my lighter and suddenly I'm psychotic." AnonGirl88 pouts.

"Anon, you not only named your lighter, you claimed that it asked you to marry it." Lance says.

"Hey! You leave Julius out of this! And I made no such claim. I said that Pyro asked me to marry him" AnonGirl88 snaps.

"Which I did not!" Pyro responds.

"Excuse me, but would it be too much trouble to get on with this parody before the day is over?" Hank asks.

"Huh, oh yeah, get on with it already." AnonGirl88 says dismissivly. "Now somebody GET ME OUT OF THIS THING!!"

"I second that!" Pyro adds.

Jean spins around and sees a very angry looking Hank standing at the doorway.

"Daddy!" she exclaims.

"I consider myself a reasonable merman." he says coolly. "I set certain rules, and I expect those rules to be obeyed!"

"But Daddy-" Jean starts but then Hank cuts her off.

"Is it true that you rescued a human from drowning?"

"Daddy I had to."

"Contact with the human world is forbidden! Ariel, you know this!"

"He would have died!"

"One less human to worry about." Suddenly the Acolytes and Brotherhood start cheering.

"Quiet on the set!" AnonGirl88 yells.

"You don't even know him!" Jean says angrilly.

"Know him? I don't have to know him, they're all the same! Spineless harpooning fish-eating vermin! Incapable of any real feeling." Hank says. The Acolytes and Brotherhood cheer even louder.

"I said quiet on the set!" AnonGirl88 screams.

"Daddy I love him!" Jean yells. She looks shocked at her own words, but not as shocked as Hank.

"No. Have you lost your senses completley? He's a human, you're a mermaid!" Hank exclaims

"I don't care." Jean says stubbornly.

"So help me, Ariel, I am going to get through to you!" Hank yells, powering up his trident, "And if this is what it takes, so be it!" And he immeadiatly starts blowing everything up.

"Yeah!! Burn, baby, burn!!" Pyro yells.

"Whoo-hoo!" AnonGirl88 hoots.

"Get those two out of here." Scott says. As the two psychotics are wheeled away, Hank continues to blow stuff up while Jean tries in vain to stop him. Hank finally aims at the statue, and **_KABOOM!!!!_** It's blown to pieces. Jean swims to her rock and starts crying. Hank swims away sadly, while Remy and Sam swim over to her.

"Ariel, Remy-" Remy begins, but Jean cuts him off.

"Just go away."

Remy looks hurt, but he and Sam do as she says. As soon as they're gone, Lance and Pietro the eels show themselves and begin to casually swim around above Jean.

"Poor child." Lance remarks.

"Poor sweet child." Pietro adds.

"She has a very serious problem."

"If only there was something we could do."

"But there is something."

"Who, who are you?" Jean sniffs.

"Don't be scared." Pietro says soothingly.

"We represent someone who can help you." Lance tells her as he and Pietro swim around her head and through her hair.

"Someone who can make all your dreams come true."

"Just imagine." They both say. "You and your prince, together, forever."

"I don't understand." Jean says.

"Ursula has great power." Pietro hisses.

"The sea witch?" Jean asks. "Why that, I couldn't possibly, no! Get out of here, leave me alone!" With that said, she buries her head in her arms again.

"Suit yourself." Lance says.

"It was only a suggestion." Pietro adds airlly.

As he and Lance swim to the doorway, he uses his tail to flick the broken face of the statue in Jeans direction. She glances up and looks at it. She picks it up, then calls out.

"Wait!"

"Yes?" Pietro and Lance turn around. Meanwhile, outside the entrance, Sam and Remy are sitting around feeling sad about what happend to Jean.

"Poor Ariel." Sam sniffs.

"Remy didn't mean to tell, it was an accident." Remy defends. A shadow passes over their heads. They look up and see Jean swimming away with Lance and Pietro. Remy quickly swims up.

"Ariel, where are you going?" He gets up in her face. "Ariel, what are you doing with dis riff-raff?"

"Who are you calling riff-raff, crab boy?!" Lance snaps.

"Just get on with it, Alvers!" Scott groans.

"Make me, Summers!" Lance yells.

"Scott, we've got a problem." Jamie says.

"Not now, Jamie." Scott says.

"But the director and co-director are gone!" the twelve year old says.

"WHAT! When did this happen?!" Scott yells.

"About five minutes ago, these three girls came by and got them out of their straight jackets and took off in a brown mini van."

"Oh no, by any chance was one of them eighteen with brown hair and brown eyes wearing a red t-shirt, blue jeans, a Giants baseball cap, and a watch that looks just like Kurt's image inducer?"

"Uh-huh."

"And was one of them sixteen with dirty blonde hair and grey eyes wearing a grey sweater and faded blue jeans?"

"Yup."

"And just out of curiousity, was the last one also sixteen but with really short black hair, amber eyes, and wearing a faded black tank top and ripped black jeans, with barbed wire tattoos just above her elbows?"

"How'd you know that?" Jamie asks. Scott smacks his head.

"Great, AnonGirl88's insane OC's have rescued her and Pyro. Who knows what those maniacs are planning?"

"Oh I know that, I over heard them say that they're going to hunt down Mr. Logan." Jamie responds. Scott sighs.

"Well that's a relief. At least we won't have to worry about them burning the set down again."

"Does that mean we can get back to the parody now?" Pietro yells.

"Yeah, yeah, get on with it!"

"I'm going to go see Ursula." Jean says before swimming off with the eels. Remy gasps and swims after her.

"Ariel, no! No, she's a demon!" Remy exclaims.

"Why don't you tell my father, you're good at that." Jean snaps. Remy looks defeated for a moment, then he waves his claw at Sam.

"Come on." he says. He and Sam follow the three conspirators through a bunch of dark and scary stuff. When they get to a coral reef that resembles a gigantic dinosaur, Jean hesitates.

"This way!" Lance and Pietro hiss. Jean then follows them in. As they swim past the sickly garden of sea weed like things, some of them start grabbing at Jean. She manages to struggle loose and swims well out of reach, then Agatha's voice floats through the water.

"Come in, come in my child. We mustn't lurk in doorways." Agatha comes out of her hiding spot, hands on her hips. "It's rude. One might question your upbringing." she chuckles and swims over to her sea shell vanity and begins putting mousse in her hair. "Now, you're here because you have a thing for a human, this prince fellow? Not that I blame you, he is quite a 'catch', isn't he?"

Agatha laughs at her own joke while Jean carefully swims closer. Agatha graps a small sea shell and squeezes it, revealing that it's lipstick.

"Well, angel fish. The solution to your problem is simple." she puckers her lips after applying the lipstick. "The only way to get what you want is to become a human yourself."

"Can you do that?" Jean asks. Agatha smiles evilly to herself then turns around to face Jean, a kind smile replacing the secret evil one.

"My dear, sweet child, that's what I do! It's what I live for, to help unfortunate merfolk, like yourself! Poor souls, with no one else to turn to."

'_I admit that in the past I've been a nasty,_

_They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch._

_But you'll find that nowadays, _

_I've mended all my ways,_

_Repented, seen the light and made the switch._

_True, yes!_

_And I fortunatley know a little magic._

_It's a talent that I always have possessed._

_And dear lateley, please don't laugh,_

_I use it on behalf_

_Of the miserable, lonely and depressed._

_(Pathetic.)_

_Poor unfortunate souls,_

_In pain! In need!_

In her cauldron, a non-skinny mermaid and a twig-thin merman appear, looking very sad.

_This one longing to be thinner, that one wants to get the girl,_

_And I help them! Yes I do._

Agatha uses her magic and gives the mermaid a super-models upper body and gives the merman a bodybuilders upper body. The two then embrace happily.

_Now it's happened once or twice, _

_Someone couldn't pay the price,_

_And I'm afraid I had to rake them across the coals._

She opens her hand to the two, but they shrug and hold out their arms, indicating they can't pay her. She uses her magic to turn them into the creepy little sea weed things.

_Yes I've had the odd complaint, _

_But on the whole I've been a saint!_

_To those poor, unfortuanate souls!_

"Now, here's the deal. I will make you a potion that will turn you into a human for three days." Agatha says, leading Jean over to her cauldron. "You got that? Three days. Now listen, this is important." She makes the cauldron show pictures to emphasise the situation. "Before the sun sets on the third day, you've got to make dear old princey fall in love with you. That is, he's got to kiss you. Not just any kiss, the kiss of true love. If he does kiss you before the third day, you'll remain human permnanentley. But if he doesn't, you'll turn back into a mermaid and, you'll belong to me." she hisses the last three words dangerously.

"Non, Ariel!" Remy yells. Lance and Pietro quickly grab him and Sam and wrap around their mouths, muffling any more protests.

"Have we got a deal?" Agatha asks.

"If I become human, I'll never see my father or sisters again." Jean says sadly.

"That's right. But, you'll have your man." Agatha says. "Life's full of tough choices, isn't it?" she chuckles.

"It's a shame some of us didn't have a choice in doing this parody." Jason mutters off stage.

"Be quiet, Mastermind!" Scott yells.

"Oh, and there is one more little thing." Agatha adds, ignoring the interruption. "We haven't discussed the method of payment. You can't get something for nothing, you know."

"But I don't have any-" Jean begins, but Agatha puts a tentacle over her lips, effectivley shutting her up.

"I'm not asking much. Just a token, really, a trifle! You'll never even miss it." Agatha says. "What I want is, your voice."

"My voice?" Jean asks, her hand at her throat.

"You've got it sweet cheeks, no more talking, singing, zip!" Agatha says.

"But without my voice, how can I-" Jean starts, but Agatha interrupts her.

"You'll have your looks! You're pretty face! And don't underestimate the importance of body language, ha!

'_The men up there don't like a lot of blabber!_

_They think a girl who gossips is a bore!_

_Yes on land it's much preffered _

_For ladies not to say a word,_

_And after all dear what is idle chatter for?_

_Come on, they're not all that impressed with conversation._

_True gentlemen avoid it when they can._

_But they dout and swoon and swan_

_On a lady who's withdrawn!_

_It's she who holds her tongue who gets her man!_

_Come on, you poor unfortunate soul!_

_Go ahead, make your choice!_

_I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day,_

_It won't cost much, just your voice!_

Agatha begins to throw a bunch of stuff into her cauldron as she sings, creating a lot of smoke and bubbles.

_You poor unfortunate soul!_

_It's sad, but true!_

She stands right behind Jean and forces a pen and scroll into her hand.

_If you want to cross the bridge my sweet_

_You have got to pay the toll._

_Take a gulp and take a breath_

_And go ahead and sign the scroll!_

Out of Jeans ear shot, she quietly adds to Lance and Pietro:

_Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her boys!_

_The boss is on a roll!!!_

_This poor unfortunate soul!!_

Jean takes a deep breath and signs the scroll in fancy script just as Agatha sang the last line. The witch grins evilly and begins to wave her arms over the cauldron.

_Beluga, sarruga, come winds of the Caspien sea!_

_Now raise a sartitis, set max laryngitis,_

_Negotiate to me!_

"Now, sing!" Agatha commands as a pair of smoke hands come up and out of the cauldron.

Jean begins to sing and the smoke hands go towards her menacingly. They go into her mouth and pull out a small glowing orb. Jean closes her mouth and stares as the hands take away the orb, which continues to sing untill Agatha locks it into a small, golden spiral shell. Agatha then begins to laugh evilley as bubbles surround and press against Jean until they all become one giant bubble, with Jean trapped inside. Sparks fly as her tail splits into two seperate legs. The bubble bursts, and Jean struggles to swim to the surface for air. Sam and Remy immeadiatley break away from Lance and Pietro and help her swim to the surface.

"And cut, that's it for today." Ray says, flipping through AnonGirl88's clip board papers. Scott snatches it away from him.

"What? It can't end here! What about my scene?" he whines.

"Well these are the director's notes and the notes say to stop here for today." Ray says.

"But, but, but," Scott begins to stammer while Ray snatches the clip board back.

"It also says that in case she and the co-director, in this case Pyro, decide to hunt down anyone who managed to escape, Fishy is in charge."

"What?! That psychedelic psychotic shark is in cha-" Scott begins but Ray interrupts him.

"Scott, think about it." he says.

"Oh. You're right, at least Fishy is slightly more sane than his owner. At least he doesn't have an obsession with fire." Scott says.

"No, just bubbles." Other Dude says nonchalantly as he flies by in a miniature flying saucer. Scott and Ray exchange glances.

"He's joking, right?" Ray asks.

"Of course he is, after 'Finding Nemo', a bubbles obsessed shark would be a little too cliche', even for Anon's tastes." Scott says. "Right?"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Heh, for anyone curious about the three mystery girls, they're my original characters. That means I own them, so don't steal them. So, will AnonGirl88 and Pyro be able to recover the missing Wolverine with the help of these girls? Is Fishy the purple and green shark really obsessed with bubbles, or is Other Dude lying as always? Find out in later chapters!

Shout outs-

Violet Aura: Thanks, so glad you enjoyed it! Ariel is one of my favorite Disney princesses too, that's why I did this in the first place!

psychobunny410: Heh, well Lance should learn to stop leaving his Jeep unattended. Good luck with your WWE parody!

Readerrr Grrrl: You are so right. Hmm, to be perfectly honest, I never even thought about giving Wolverine a part, mostly because he took off on his motorcycle the second he got wind of this little parody. But don't worry, I'm sure he'll turn up sooner or later.

Thanks to everyone who's enjoyed my little insanity! Happy Holidays, everybody!!


	7. Love at Second Sight

Chapter 7. Things are starting to get interesting. Sorry this took so long folks, I've been busy with stuff. I should have said this in the first chapter; shout-outs go to people who have reviewed the previous chapter, that way I know that they're all caught up. Sorry for the inconvieniance. Also, I slightly changed the descriptions of my OCs.

"Where the heck is the director?" Forge asks. He, Sam, Ray, and Bobby are on the beach next to the ocean, where Fishy is waiting for the play to start so he can begin filming.

"Did you ask the shark?" Bobby asks sarcastically, pointing his thumb at Fishy.

"As a matter of fact I did." Forge says. "But I don't speak shark, so I didn't understand word he said."

"Well ah for one am not complaining." Sam says. "Do you have any idea how humiliating it is to pretend to be a fat little yellow fish?" he asks.

"It certainly can't be as bad as pretending to be a tiny little sea horse." Forge replies. Just then, Kitty comes out wheeling a flat telivision screen on a luggage carrier.

"Hey Forge, AnonGirl88 is on that tele-communicator thing you invented." she says, placing it in front of him.

"Oh man, I knew I was going to regret inventing this stupid thing." Forge says before turning it on.

"Well then why did you invent it if you knew you'd regret it?" Bobby asks.

"Nothing good on T.V." Forge shrugs.

The screen fizzles for a second, then AnonGirl88 is seen, now wearing a black sleeveless t-shirt and a black beret. In the background, Pyro is sitting next to her playing a GameBoy Advance SP. They appear to be in the back seat of a mini van.

"Hi guys! So how's the parody going without me?" she asks.

"We haven't done anything yet." Forge replies.

"WHAT! WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING!" she screams. "WE'RE ON A SCHEDULE HERE!"

"Cool it Anon, or you'll attract the police again." a girls voice is heard in the background. AnonGirl88 takes a few deep breaths and calms herself.

"You're right, sorry." she apologises.

"Well you never said that we were supposed to do anything while you were gone." Bobby defends.

"Yes I did, I told Fishy to tell you to keep going on schedule while we rounded up the escaped pris, I mean, actors." the insane director quickly covers up.

"Well how are we supposed to know what that shark of yours is saying, he doesn't talk!" Forge says.

"Didn't Fishy give you the note I wrote?" AnonGirl88 asks, gripping the seat as the van bumps violently. "That had better not have been an armadillo!" she snaps at who ever's driving.

"What are you talking about, there was no- OW!" Forge starts but is interrupted when Fishy throws a small canister at him, which of course hits him in the head.

"The note inside that." AnonGirl88 says. "Now get busy! ACTION!" she says before turning off her end of the communicator.

Jean, Sam, and Remy are all at the surface, breathing heavily after their swim. Once Jean's sufficiently recovered, she lifts up one of her new legs and wiggles her new toes, grinning slightly.

"Well, look at what ze catfish dragged in!" Kurt says as he flies down. He lands neatly on Jeans leg. "Look at you! Zere is most certainly something very diffrent about you!" he exclaims. "Now don't tell me, let me guess. I've got it, it's your hair-do, right! You've been using ze dinglehopper, haven't you?" Jean shakes her head. "No? Well of course not, let me think. New sea shells?" he asks. Jean gives him a look while Remy simply glares at him, clearly annoyed. Jean starts to gently bounce her leg to give the blue seagull a hint, but Kurt is oblivious. "No new sea shells. I gotta admit, I just can't seem to put my feather on it, but if I just stand here long enou-"

"SHE'S GOT LEGS, YOU IDIOT!" Remy finally snaps, causing Kurt to fly up in surprise. "She traded her voice to de sea witch and got legs, geez homme!" Remy says.

"I knew zat." Kurt says, causing Remy to smack his head with his claw.

"Ariel's been turned into a human, and she's got to find a prince and he's gotta, he's gotta kiss her!" Sam says as Jean shakily attempts to stand up.

"An' she's only got t'ree days." Remy says. Suddenly Jean falls down hard and drenches poor Kurt with sea water.

"Jus' look at her! On legs! On human legs!" Remy says before gasping. "Remy's nerves are shot. Dis is a complete disaster! What would her pere say? Remy'll tell you what her pere'd say, he'd say he's gonna kill himself a crab, dat's what her pere'd say!" Remy says, working himself into a little frenzy. "Remy gonna march himself right back down dere like he shoulda done in de first place," Jean quickly picks him up and shakes her head frantically.

"An don't you shake yo' head at me, young lady. Maybe there's still time. If we could get dat witch to give you back yo' voice you could go home wit' all de normal fish and jus' be," Remy faulters at the pathetic, pittifull look Jean is giving him. "Jus' be miserable for de rest of yo' life. Alright, alright, Remy'll help you find dat prince." he finally caves. Jean kisses his and sets him down. "Boy, what a soft shell Remy turnin' out to be." he says to himself, shaking his head sadly.

"Now Ariel, I'm telling you, if you want to find humans, ze first zing you have to do is dress like one." Kurt says before he begins rumaging through a pile of junk.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the beach, Scott is walking with Roberto, but while Roberto is jumping around happily, Scotts mind is clearly in another dimension.

"That voice." he sighs. "I can't get it out of my head." he then kneels down and scratches Robertos head. "I've looked everywhere for her. Where could she be?" he asks sadly. Roberto is sympathetic for a minute, then he sniffs and is happy again, then he runs off to follow the smell. Back at the other side of the beach, Jean is modeling a dress made from sail cloth held on by ropes.

"Perfect, you look sensational." Kurt says. Suddenly, Pietro zips in and begins taking pictures.

"Say cheese, Princess Red!" he cackles. Jean tries to yell at him, but no sound comes out her mouth.

"Sorry Jean, Anon wanted it to be authentic, so she made me make a device that prevents you from talking or using your telepathy to communicate." Forge calls from backstage.

"Next stop, the Internet!" Pietro crows. Just as he's about to speed off, the camera flies out of his hands and breaks. "Hey!"

"I never said it prevented her from using her telekinesis." Forge reminds him. "Now get off the set before I release the three Dudes!"

"NO! Not that!" Pietro yelps before running away. Roberto then comes on and barks at Jean, startling her. She runs around a big rock before climbing up it to get away from him. Remy hides in the folds of the skirt. Scott comes in and ruffles up Robertos fur.

"Max! There you are! What's gotten into you, boy?" he asks. He looks up and sees Jean. "Oh, oh I see." He stands up and smiles at her. "Are you alright, miss? I'm sorry if this knuckle head scared you, he's harmless really."

"Who are you calling knuckle head!" Roberto asks.

"It's in the script, Roberto." Forge yells.

"Well how should I know that, I'm the dog, I didn't get a script!" Roberto yells.

"Just get on with it already! The sooner we finish this, the sooner we can go surfing!" Ray yells.

Scott sees Jean grinning at him and he faulters a bit. "You, you seem very familiar to me. Have we met?" he asks. Jean begins to nod frantically. "We have met, I knew it! You're the one! The one I've been looking for! What's your name!"

Jean tries to tell him, but then she remembers that she doesn't have a voice.

"What is it?" Scott asks, confused. Jean taps her throat and shakes her head sadly. "Oh, then you couldn't be who I thought you were." he says sadly. Roberto and Jean both blow hair out of their eyes irratabley. Then Jean brightens up and begins to use wild gestures in attempt to explain the situation. But she gets to excited and ends up falling forward, straight into Scotts arms.

"Whoa, carefull! Wow, you must have really been through something." Scott says. Jean clings to him as they stare into each others eyes. "Don't worry, I'll help you." Scott says when he finnally snaps out of it. He helps her stand up and leads her to the castle. Jean looks back and winks at Kurt and Sam. Kurt winks back and gives her a thumbs up sign.

A while later, Jean is sitting in a bathtub full of bubbles. Kitty dumps a bucket of clean water on her head while talking, mostly to herself.

"Washed up from a shipwreck. Oh, you poor dear. We'll have you fixed up in, like, no time." she says before gingerly picking up the old sail cloth, in which Remy is still hiding.

"I'll just," she pauses to make a face while holding it as far away from her body as possible. "I'll just, like, get this washed for you." Kitty tells her before leaving the room. "Although it'd probably be a lot more sanitary to just burn it." she mutters to herself.

Kitty walks into the next room and dumps the cloth into a bucket of water surrounded by Amanda, Tabitha, Jubilee, and Rahne, who are gossiping while they do the laundry. While talking, one of them grabs the cloth and starts to scrub it, with poor Remy still inside.

"Am I the only one here who thinks it's a little weird that someone who's supposed to be such a huge pyromaniac has such an obsession with the ocean?" Jubilee asks.

"I know, I mean she's got a purple and green pet shark, her first parody is The Little Mermaid, it's kind of an oxymoron, don't you think?" Amanda replies.

"Well she's certainly a moron, no question about that." Tabitha remarks as she clips the sail cloth to the wire.

Remy pants for breath as he half hangs out the fold. Once he catches his breath, he dives into an open window. When he looks around, he sees various fish being prepared for dinner, causing hime to pass out. Meanwhile in the dining room, Jason and Scott are waiting for Jean.

"Now Eric, be reasonable. Nice young ladies don't just swim around rescueing people in the middle of the ocean, and than flutter off into oblivion." Jason says. "Well actually I could make that happen, but since we're talking about real life, the chances of it happening aren't good." he adds.

"I'm telling you Grim she was REAL!" Scott yells. "I'm going to find that girl. And I'm going to marry her."

"Awfully eager, aren't we?" Jason mutters.

"Like, come on honey, don't be shy!" Kitty says as she pulls Jean into the room. Jean is wearing a beautiful frilly pink ballroom gown. Scott stares at her with his mouth hanging open as she comes forward.

"Oh Eric isn't she a vision." Jason says in monotone, resting his head on his hand with his elbow on the table, looking bored out of his mind.

"Wow." Scott says, snapping out of his trance slightly. "You look wonderful." he says to her, causing her to blush.

"Come come come, you must be famished. Here, let me help you, my dear." Jason says as he helps Jean into her chair. "There we are, quite comfy, hmm? It's not often we get such a, ugh, lovely guest for dinner." he says, trying to keep from gagging as he sits back down. Jean sees a dinner fork and begins using it to comb her hair, but stops immeadiatly when she sees Jason and Scott staring at her. Jason takes out his pipe and lights it, then sees Jean watching him.

"Er, do you like it?" he asks, holding it out to her so she can see. "It is rather-" Jean puffs into the pipe, sending soot into his face, which causes Scott to start laughing.

"Oh my!" Kitty says.

"Ahem, so sorry, Grimm." Scott says, trying to keep a straight face.

"Why Eric, that's the first time I've seen you smile in weeks!" Kitty exclaims.

"Yes, very amusing." Jason sneers, wiping his face. "Carlotta my dear, what's for dinner?"

"And stunt double!" Forge yells from off stage. Kitty leaves and Amara comes in.

"Okay, start where we left off." Forge adds.

"You're going to love it, Chef's been fixing up his speacialty: stuffed crab!" she says clasping her hands together.

Meanwhile Remy has started to come around.

"And stunt double!" Forge yells again.

"But Remy wants to see who's playin' de chef!" Remy protests as a robotic crabs waddles in. "An' what de heck is dis?"

"It's a robo-crab, RC for short, that Shanice and I cooked up." Forge explains, holding a remote control joystick.

"Who's Shanice?" Ray asks.

"One of the girls that busted out Anon and Pyro. You know, the blonde one?" Forge says.

"When were you with Shanice?" Sam asks.

"We met at dress rehersal. I think she's got a crush on me." Forge replies. "Of course, who wouldn't?"

"Excuse me, can we just get on with this already?" Lance yells.

"Yeah, the faster we get this over with, the faster we can leave." Wanda adds.

"Alright, alright, sorry, action!" Forge yells. The RC peers over the counter and sees Fred, with a fake mustache, taking pots and pans out of a cupboard while singing off-key in poorly pronounced French with a bad accent.

"_Les poissons,_

_Les poissons,_

_How I love les poissons,_

_Love to chop_

_And to serve little fish._

As he's doing this, he begins to prepare the fish, causing the RC to turn green and naueseous looking thanks to advanced technology.

_"First I cut off their heads,_

_Then I pull out the bones,_

_Ah mais oui,_

_Ca c'est toujours delish!_

_Les poissons,_

_Les poissons,_

_He he he_

_Hah hah hah,_

_With the cleaver _

_I hack them in two!_

_I pull out what's inside_

_And I serve it up fried_

_Cause I love little fishies,_

_Don't you?_

The RC tries to get away un-noticed by hiding under a discarded lettuce leaf, but ends up running into a fish head. The whole time, Fred continues to sing, making the robo-crab greener and more nauseus looking by the second.

_Here's something for tempting the palate,_

_Prepared in the classic technique,_

_First you POUND the fish flat with a mallet,_

_Then SLASH through the skin,_

_Give the belly a slice,_

_Then you rub some salt in,_

_'Cause that makes it taste nice!"_

Fred looks down and sees the RC. It quickly retreats into it's shell as Fred picks it up carefully. While he continues to sing, he tosses it into a bowl of sauces and throws some flour on it. He then stuffs in some bread and seasoning, which the RC spits back out.

"Zut alors, I have missed one!

_Sacre bleau, what is this?_

_How on earth could I miss_

_Such a sweet little succulent crab?_

_Quel dommage, what a loss,_

_Here we go, in the sauce!_

_Now some flour, I think_

_Just a dash!_

_Now I stuff you with bread,_

_It won't hurt 'cause you're dead!_

_And you're certainly lucky you are_

_Cause it's going to be hot_

_In my big silver pot!_

_Toodleoo, mon poisson,_

_Au Revoir!"_

With that, he tosses the RC into a pot of boiling water. It quickly grabs the side of the pot and jumps back out before retreating back into its shell. Using a two pronged fork, Fred picks it up and brings it close to his face.

"What is this?" he asks before the RC reaches out and pinches his nose.

Fred screams in agony and drops the RC to the floor, which quickly begins to scramble around the floor. Enraged, Fred begins to chase after it, crashing into things and generally injuring himself in the process. The noise attracts the attention of Jason, Scott, Jean, and Amara.

"I think I'd better go and see what Louis is up to." she says. When she arrives, she sees that the kitchen is in shambles and several things are on fire. Fred is digging angrilly through one of the cupboards.

"Come out, you little pipsqueak and fight like a man!" he yells!

"Louis!" Amara exclaims, startling Fred so he smacks his head on the counter. "What are you doing!" she demands.

"Well, I was, I just, er, uh, so sorry Madame." Fred stutters, trying to smile charmingly as he pinches out the fire on his fake mustache. Amara grabs the dinner tray and leaves in a huff. Back in the dining room, Jason is trying to talk to Scott who is staring at Jean.

"You know Eric, perhaps our young guest might enjoy seeing some of the sights of the kingdom? Something in the way of a tour?" Jason suggests.

"Huh? Oh I'm sorry, what were you saying Grimm?" Scott asks, snapping out of his Jean trance.

"You can't spend all day moping about, you need to get out! Do something, get a life." Jason says. He lifts up his cover and reveals Remy underneath it.

"Whoah, whoah, easy Grimm, easy!" Scott says.

Jean sees Remy and quickly lifts up her plate and signals for him to get under. He dashes across the table and hides when no one's looking. Jean then slams the lid back down when Scott turns to her.

"It's not a bad idea, if she's interested. So what do you say, would you like to join me on a tour of the kingdom tomorrow?" he asks. Jean nods vigourously, leaning heavily on her cover.

"Wonderful! Now let's eat before this crab wanders off my plate." Jason says as he stabs the empty plate with his fork.

Later that day after sunset, Jean is leaning on the windowsill of her room, watching Scott play with Roberto on the beach. Scott looks up from petting Roberto, sees Jean and waves at her. Embarrassed, she waves shyly back and goes back inside.

"Dis has got to be, widout a doubt, de single most humiliating day of Remy's life!" Remy says irratably, tossing away a lettuce leaf. "Even though Remy didn't even get to see it." he adds with a pout.

"Not now, Remy, we're almost done." Forge says.

"Alright, alright." Remy says grumpily. Jean sets down the fork she was using to comb her hair, then she pats Remy on his head before plopping down on the feather bed.

"Remy hope's you appreciate all dat Remy goes t'rough for you, young lady." Remy says before he starts pacing across the dresser he's on. "Now, we got to come up wit' a plan to make dat boy to kiss you. Tomorrow when he takes you on dat ride, you gotta look yo' best. You gotta bat yo' eyes, like dis." he demonstrates by batting his own eyes, much to the amusement of the people off stage.

"Knock it off, we've only got a few more minutes!" Forge says. "Continue, Remy."

"Merci. You gotta pucker up yo' lips, like dis." he demonstrates again by puckering his own lips, causing everyone off stage to snicker. He ignores it and looks over Jean, who's fast asleep. He smiles and goes to curl up on the pillow next to her head. "You are hopeless, child. You know dat, completley hopeless."

Meanwhile in Atlantica, Hank is paceing around. Forge, now a sea horse, comes in.

"Any sign of them?" Hank asks.

"No, You're Majesty, we've searched everywhere. We found no traces of your daughter, or Sebastion." Forge replies sadly.

"Well keep looking! Leave no shell unturned, no coral unexplored. Let no one in this kingdom rest until she's safe at home!" Hank orders.

"Yes Sire." Forge says before swimming away. Hank sits down on his thrown miserably.

"What have I done? Oh what have I done?" he asks himself.

"And cut! We're finally done for the day!" Forge yells happily. Everyone cheers and runs off to party. Suddenly a brown, beat up van pulls onto the set and AnonGirl88 jumps out with Pyro.

"Hey everybody! We're back!" Anon says.

"Miss us?" Pyro asks.

"Who would miss you?" a nineteen year old girl with straight brown hair down to her shoulders and brown eyes quips as she climbs out of the driver's seat. She's wearing a dark red t-shirt, jeans, and white sneakers with orange laces. On her wrist is a watch that looks suspicously like Kurts image inducer, and she's wearing a black baseball cap with a red bill.

"Surprisingly enough, there are people who find this amusing." another girl says. She has dirty blonde hair that reaches the small of her back pulled back into a braid with silver ribbons woven in, steel grey eyes, and is wearing a light grey tank top, light grey pants, and silver high tops. She also has dozens of silver chains as necklaces, bracelets, belts, and anklets.

"Yeah, the same people who wear straight jackets and live in padded rooms." a third girl replies. She has very short black hair in messy spikes, scary looking amber eyes, and very pale skin. She's wearing a torn, faded black t-shirt that exposes a barbed wire wrap-around tattoo on each arm above the elbow, and equally torn and faded black jeans, as well as combat boots. She also is wearing a barbed wire necklace and barbed wire bracelets, as well as half finger gloves with metal studs on the knuckles.

"Everyone, meet Candyce Tanner, Shanice Zabrinski, and Margo Pierce, code names Eclipse, Matrix, and Mange." AnonGirl88 says. "They are my new co-co-directors."

"Co-co-directors?" Ray asks.

"They're in charge right after Fishy and Pyro." AnonGirl88 explains.

"I'm only going to say this once, my name is Mange, and if anybody even thinks of calling me that other name, I'm going to-" Mange begins, but is quickly interrupted by Candyce.

"Watch it, this is G rated, remember?"

"Okay people, now that I'm back, let's go set things up for the next chapter! And somebody get the pris- I mean actors, out of the van." AnonGirl88 says before walking off the set.

"Whos turn is it to tell her that that's the wrong way?" Mange asks, folding her arms.

Again, sorry this is late! Pretty long at least!

Shout-out!

psychobunny410: Glad you liked it! Yep, serves them right for thinking they could escape! Glad to hear that, I'll try to read it when I have the time!

As long as I get at least one review per chapter, I shall keep this up! Also, if anyone wants to know what went on while we were chasing them all down, all you have to do is ask and I'll be more than happy to make a side story to this.


	8. Kiss de girl!

Once again, I'm back! This is one of my all time favorite Disney songs in the world! Which means if these people ever want to leave the set and get on with their lives, they had better not screw this up!

AnonGirl88 and the three Dudes are playing Go Fish on the beach scene while Pyro is staring intently at the flame of his lighter. Wolverine, Juggernaut, Mystique, Sabertooth and the re-captured Magneto are tied up and gagged close by, with power-repressing collars to prevent them from escaping. Candyce, Shanice and Mange come onto the set.

"Come on Anon, you're the one who's always telling everyone that there's a schedule to keep." Candyce says.

"I know, but the Dudes are holding my GameBoy hostage." AnonGirl88 replies, glaring at the three evil Dudes.

"Yeah, well you shouldn't leave the stupid thing laying around." Other Dude says.

"Don't worry, I'll handle this." Shanice says, winking at her friends. "Wow, that's so considerate of you three!" she says to the Dudes.

"Huh?" they say, looking up from their cards.

"Stalling the parody so AnonGirl88 can keep Pyro to herself even longer, what a nice thing of you to do for her!" she replies.

"Oh yeah, and all this time we thought you hated her and wanted to be as annoying as possible!" Candyce adds, catching on. Mange just rolls her eyes and wanders off without a word.

"Yuck!" the three Dudes immeadiatley toss the GameBoy back at AnonGirl88 and fly away in their mini-saucers.

"Thanks, why didn't I think of that?" AnonGirl88 comments as she pockets the recovered electronic device.

"It was nothing, now let's get started on the parody already." Shanice says.

"In a minute." the insane director replies, hugging Pyro tightly. "I want to keep Pyro all to myself for a couple more hours."

"Oh brother, way to go, genius." Candyce says to Shanice.

"Shh. I expected this to happen." Shanice replies before turning around as if to walk away. "Well I guess we'll just have to go and tell everyone that there won't be time for the song today." she says loudly, catching AnonGirl88's attention.

"Huh? That's today?" she asks. When the two co-co-directors nod, the director lets go of Pyro and runs off to start the parody. A few seconds later she runs back, grabs Pyro, and runs off again dragging him with her.

"Let's do this thing!" she yells.

Scott is driving a beautiful, horse drawn carriage away from the castle and into the village, with Jean sitting next to him.

"Why do I have to be the stupid horse?" Mystique whines as she stops and morphs into her normal form.

"Do I look like I can afford a real horse?" AnonGirl88 retorts. "Nowstop complaining and start pulling or I'll have you brain-washed along with the guys!"

"Fine." Mystique grumbles. As the carriage is pulled over the bridge, Sam swims under and calls up to Remy.

"Has he kissed her yet?" he asks.

"Not yet." Remy tells him. Sam groans. As Jean and Scott go dancing, Kurt comes and calls to Sam.

"Yo, Flounder! Any kissing?" he asks.

"No, not yet." Sam replies.

"Hm, well zey had better get cracking!" Kurt comments.

As Scott and Jean are leaving town, Scott lets Jean drive. This turns out to be a huge mistake because Jean immeadiatly makes it go as fast as she can, causing the carriage to tilt and swerve.

"And yet she's still a better driver than Kitty." Ray says.

"Hey!" Kitty protests.

"Shh!" AnonGirl88 snaps. As Jean continues to drive, they approach a large canyon with no bridge. Needless to say, Scott is quite freaked out.

"I'M GOING TO DIE!" Scott screams, covering his eyes.

"Calm down, Cyke, as much fun as it would be to see you crash and burn, ooo, burn..." Pyro starts, but then he goes off into a daze as a lit match is held in front of his face by Mange. While Pyro is being led away, AnonGirl88 is too busy arguing with the three Dudes to notice. While they're doing that, Mystique sails over the canyon and makes it, just bumping the back end slightly.

"Did anybody even see that?" she asks. No one answers her.

"For the last time, this is rated G, you sick minded little freaks!" she shouts.

"All we're saying is that it would be much more interesting if you made the actions scenes more action packed." Dude says.

"The action scenes are as action packed as they're going to get, this is a Disney movie!" the director snaps. "You want action, where were you three when I was stuck on my crossover?"

"Running for our lives from that stupid shark that you sicked on us!" Other, Other Dude retaliates.

"Excuses, excuses!"

"I hate to interrupt this oh so fascinating debate, but can we please get on with this already?" Scott asks.

"Yeah, fine. Action!" AnonGirl88 yells through her bull horn as she sits back in her directors chair, still unaware that Pyro is no longer sitting next to her. The scene changes to a calm peacefull lagoon at twilight. Scott and Jean are sitting in a row boat, and as Scott rows, Jean looks anxious. The two are unaware that they are being watched.

"Move over, move your big feathers! I can't see a thing!" Sam complains.

"Nothing is happening. Only one day left, an zat boy hasn't puckered up once." Kurt says. "Okay, alright, zis calls for a little vocal, romantic stimulation." he says to Sam, winking before flying up into a tree, scaring away a bunch of blue birds in the process. He clears his throat and begins singing a beautiful love song in German.

"Doesn't he have the most beautiful voice you've ever heard?" Amanda sighs dreamily.

"Oh no not again. Kurt we went over this in rehearsals!" AnonGirl88 yells. "You're supposed to pretend to sing badly, remember! This is not the time to show off for your girlfriend!"

"Oops, sorry fraelien!" Kurt apologises before he begins squawking some unidentifiable tune off key.

"Thank you, Kurt." AnonGirl88 winces, her fingers stuffed in her ears. She isn't the only one suffering.

"Whoah, somebody oughta find that poor animal and put it out of it's misery." Scott says to Jean. Jean flinches and smiles wryly at Kurt, who winks at her and gives her the 'O.K' hand sign.

"Geez, homme, Remy surrounded by amateurs." Remy says before diving into the water. He breaks off a reed and re-surfaces.

"You want some'ting done right, you got to do it yo'self. First, we got to create de mood." he says to some ducks and turtles.

"Percussion." the turtles turn over onto their backs and the ducks use the shells like drums.

"Strings." some crickets and grasshoppers use their legs to produce stinged instrument music.

"Winds." wind blows across some reeds, producing wind instrument music.

"Words." here Remy bows and begins to sing:

_"Dere you see her_

_Sitting dere across de way._

_She don't got a lot to say,_

_But dere's some'ting about her._

_An' you don't know why _

_But you dyin' to try,_

_You wanna kiss de girl."_

"Did you hear something?" Scott asks, looking over his shoulder as he trys to see where the music is coming from. Jean merely shrugs.

For the next verse, Pyro, disguised as an orange and yellow flamingo, joins in after the third line. To prevent her from tackling Pyro, the director has been tied to a chair and has had duct tape put over her mouth by the three co-co-directors.

_"Yes, you want her._

_Look at her you know you do!_

_Possible she want you too,_

_Dere's one way to ask her._

_It don't take a word, _

_Not a single word,_

_Go on an kiss de girl."_

Scott and Jean lean in as if they're going to kiss, but Scott pulls back and rows, much to theannoyance of Remy and Pyro. Remy ducks his head under the water and waves a claw.

"Sing wid Remy now." as Scott pulls up the oar, Todd, Wolverine, Magneto, and Sabertooth, all disguised as frogs, come up with it, singing. During the fourth line to the seventh line , Remy is sitting with Fred and Juggernaut, who are disguised as a pelican and a tortoise.

_"Sha la la la la la_

_Look like de boy to shy,_

_A'int gonna kiss de girl._

_Sha la la la la la_

_A'int dat sad,_

_Aint it a shame,_

_Too bad, he gonna miss de girl."_

You know, I feel really bad about not knowing your name. Maybe I could guess." Scott says as he takes a break from rowing. "Is it Raven?" At this, Jean makes a face which makes him laugh. "Okay, no! How about, Ororo? Irene?" he continues to guess, making Jean shake her head.

"Ariel. Her name is Ariel!" Remy whispers in his ear from a hanging tree branch, then swings away before Scott can see him.

"Ariel?" he asks thin air. Jean nods her head happily, so he takes her hands in his. "Ariel! Huh, that's kind of pretty. Okay, Ariel." he whispers as the two hold hands. As Remy continues to sing, the boat drifts into a small, secluded area surrounded by willow trees. Two storks lift away the curtain of leaves as they go in. At the fourth line, minnows jump around Remy's head, singing 'la la la'

_"Now's yo' moment._

_Floating in a blue lagoon._

_Boy you better do it soon,_

_No time could be better._

_She don't say a word_

_An' she won't say a word _

_Until you kiss de girl!"_

Remy dives under the water, then comes back up with all the fish that helped out during the 'Under the Sea' scene. They circle the boat as they sing, while fire flies fly around and make the air sparkle. Pyro and the rest of the flammingos have to stop Kurt from interrupting about halfway through. Around the last line, Remy gets so excited that he starts to strangle a plastic blue seagull stunt double as the fish and birds encourage the couple to kiss.

_"Sha la la la la la_

_Don't be scared_

_You got de mood prepared_

_Go on an kiss de girl!_

_Sha la la la la la_

_Don't stop now_

_Don't try to hide it how_

_You wanna kiss de girl!_

_Sha la la la la la_

_Float along_

_And listen to de song,_

_De song say kiss de girl!_

_Sha la la la la la_

_De music play_

_Do what de music say_

_You got to kiss de girl!_

_You've got to kiss de girl_

_You wanna kiss de girl_

_Go on an kiss de girl!_

Scott and Jean are slowly leaning in to kiss, and just as their lips are a fraction away from touching, the boat suddenly tips over and throws the two into the water. Remy smacks his forehead with his claw as the birds panic and fly away.

"Whoah! Hang on, I've got you!" Scott says as he helps Jean stand up. As they walk away, Lance and Pietro appear next to the side and slap their tails like a high-five to congradulate each other. Agatha watches threw her crystal ball.

"Nice work boys! That one was a close one, too close! The little tramp! She's better than I thought." she grudgingly admits as she begins throwing various potions and ingrediants into her pot.

"At this rate he'll be kissing her by sunset for sure! Well, it's time Ursula took matters into her own hands!" Here she pauses long enough to throw in a glass bubble containing a butterfly.

"Triton's daughter will be mine. And then I'll make him writhe. I'll see him wriggle like a worm on a hook!" She clutches the sea shell pendant containing Jean's voice and laughs evilly as smoke and bubbles surround her and obstruct everything from view except her sillohete. Agatha then transforms into Wanda as tentacles turn into human legs.

Meanwhile, Scott is sitting on the beach playing a flute, then stops and watches Jean in her bedroom window as she brushes her hair. He's so absorbed in his thoughts that he doesn't notice Jason coming up to him until Jason places a hand on his shoulder.

"Eric? If I may say, far better than any dream girl, is one of flesh and blood. One warm, caring, and right before your eyes." he says wisely before going back inside.

Scott thinks for a moment, then throws his flute out to sea. Just as he's about to go inside and talk to Jean, he hears Ariels voice singing. He looks over the rocks and sees Wanda, with her long hair, walking along the beach singing. The sea shell pendant around her neck is glowing, and in seconds Scott is hypnotised.

"And we're done for the day!" AnonGirl88 cheers when she is freed before she pulls Pyro, who was led back to his chair after the song by Mange, into a tight hug.

"That was great! Hey, how'd you get Wanda to do that?" Pietro asks.

"Oh, I have my ways." Anon says as she winks at 'Wanda', who winks back. At that exact moment, Todd flies past them and crashes into a tree.

"I am not going to tell you again, stay away from me!" the real Wanda sceams from off camera.

"Huh? You mean this is Mystique?" Pietro asks.

"Not in a million years." Mystique says as she walks by.

"Wait a minute, if the real Wanda is over there, and that was Mystique, than who's this!" Pietro yelps, looking very confused.

"That's for us to know and you to never know." the fake Wanda says. Before Pietro can retaliate, he's knocked over by the three Dudes in their mini-saucers, and then again by Fishy who's chasing them.

"WE SHALL HAVE REVENGE, ANONGIRL88!" the three Dudes yell.

"Yeah right!" AnonGirl88 yells back, accidently letting go of Pyro, who immeadiatley takes off.

"Aren't you worried?" the fake Wanda asks her.

"Nope. They're just saying that. It's a known fact that you can't have revenge upon another persons revenge." the insane director replies. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have to find Pyro again." she says before walking away.

Will the Dudes get revenge? Who is the fake Wanda? Will AnonGirl88 ever make sense? If you want to find out, you'll just have to review and wait for chapter 9, now won't you?

Shout-Outs!

Helen: Thank you very much! Hope this was soon enough for you!

psychobunny410: Your wish is my command! Be on the look out for it!

If anyone wants to see what my muses look like, go to the link to my Quizilla homepage on my profile, go to quiz list, go to My Muses, and there you go.


	9. The end or is it? Yeah, it is

Chapter 9 is up. Wow, the last chapter of my first parody. Warning: This chapter is filled with randomness and insanity. Do not read this if you are drinking carbonated beverages or they may go out your nose while you're laughing. Trust me. Even I cracked up once or twice.

Candyce, Shanice and Mange are once again searching for AnonGirl88 and Pyro so they can start the parody. However, this seems to be easier said than done, because the three co-co-directors look very irratated.

"Where are those maniacs!" Mange screams suddenly.

"Maybe they're hiding from the three Dudes, they did say they were going to have revenge." Candyce offers.

"Or maybe they've stolen Lance's Jeep and are on a sugar and caffeine high again." Mange retaliates.

"Or they're using parts of the set to create a bon fire while dancing around wearing coconut bras and grass skirts over their clothes, and big fruit hats." Shanice says.

"Where'd that come from?" Candyce asks.

"Over there, where AnonGirl88 and Pyro are using parts of the set to create a bon fire while dancing around wearing coconut bras and grass skirts over their clothes with big fruit hats." Shanice says, pointing to the very strange scene in front of them.

"Oh no, not this again!" Candyce exclaims as she runs forward to stop them. "You two psychos knock it off right now!" she yells.

"But it's fun!" AnonGirl88 whines.

"So is this!" the three Dudes cry out as they dump 20 pounds of green Jello from their flying saucers on the two maniacs and the bon fire.

"AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHH!" Pyro and AnonGirl88 scream.

"You ain't seen nothing yet!" the aliens call as they fly away.

"Well, now that the bon fire's out, I guess we'll just have to start the parody." Candyce says, trying not to laugh at the sight.

"I guess." AnonGirl88 grumbles.

"And just so everybody's clear, we hypnotised Scott to keep things seem mildly authentic." Shanice adds, turning to the camera.

Kurt flies into Jeans room early in the morning, looking very happy. However, when he crash lands on the bed and wakes up Jean and Remy, they look less than amused.

"Ariel! Ariel, wake up! Wake up! I just heard ze news, congradulations kiddo we did it!" he exclaims.

"What is dis idiot babbling about?" Remy grumbles, trying to go back to sleep. Kurt nudges him playfully.

"Right, as if you two didn't know, huh? Ze whole town is buzzing about ze prince getting himself hitched zis afternoon! You know, he's getting married." here Kurt pauses to give Remy a noogie before turning to Jean. "You silly sidewalker! I just wanted to wish you luck, I'll catch you later, I wouldn't miss it!" And then he flies away.

Jean takes a minute to register what was just said, and when it sinks in, she grins, kisses Remy on the cheek, and quickly gets out of bed. She takes just a moment to glance in the mirror to check her hair before running downstairs. Before she makes it to the main hall, she sees Scott and Wanda talking to Jason. She hides behind a pillar as she eavesdrops.

"Well, uh, Eric, it seems that I was, er, do I have to say it?" Jason asks the director.

"Yes and hurry up about it!" AnonGirl88 shouts, looking around fearfully. "I want to get out of here as soon as possible!"

"What happened to it being immpossible to get revenge on another persons revenge?" the fake Wanda teases.

"Do you want me to reveal your real identity right now? Because I will!" AnonGirl88 snaps. Suddenly the three Dudes fly by once again.

"ANONGIRL88 SAID THAT SHE OWNS THE LITTLE MERMAID AND THE CHARACTERS OF X-MEN!" they yell. Suddenly a bunch of lawyers appear, chasing poor AnonGirl88 far away.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! NO I DIDN'T! I DID NOT SAY THAT! CURSE YOU DUDES!" she screams.

"Hey, come back here!" Mr. L yells as he and Fishy chase after the lawyers. The entire cast blinks.

"Well, since the director's gone, I guess we'll just have to go home." Jason says, trying to sneak away.

"Not so fast, mate." Pyro says. "You seem to forget that I'm the co-director, and that means I'm in charge now."

"We're doomed." Remy comments, earning a glare from the Aussie.

"Well then you'll just have to do it without me." Jason says, using his powers to make himself appear to disappear. "Now you see me, and now you don't!" he cackles.

"Oh well, good thing we planned for this. Bring in ole Bucket Head!" Pyro yells. Magneto walks in like a zombie, with a glazed look in his eyes. "Alright Mags, you are to take over for Mastermind, got it?" Pyro asks him, trying to keep a straight face.

"Yes." Magneto says. Pyro snickers then yells through a bull horn. "ACTION!"

"Well Eric it appears that I was mistaken. This mystery maiden of yours does in fact exist. And she is lovely. Congradulations my dear." Magneto says in a monotone.

"Who else is extremly glad that the real Wanda isn't here?" Candyce asks. Everyone but Scott and Magneto raises their hand.

"We wish to be married as soon as possible." Scott says in the same monotone as Magneto.

"Oh yes of course, but these things do take time you know." Magneto says.

"This afternoon Grimsby. The wedding ship departs at sunset." Scott says.

"Very well Eric. As you wish." As he says this, Jean runs off crying. 'Wanda' smirks and plays with the seashell necklace around he neck.

Late afternoon, the wedding ship, complete with frilly, lacey decorations along the sides, leaves the dock. Jean is on the pier weeping bitterly as Remy and Sam sadly look on. Meanwhile, Kurt is flying around, humming the Wedding March to himself. Suddenly he hears 'Wanda' singing from the ship. He lands and watches as she twirls around in a slip singing and laughing evilly.

"_What a lovely little bride I'll make_

_My dear, I look divine._

_Things are working out according to_

_My ultimate design._

_Soon I'll have that little mermaid_

_And the ocean will be mine!"_

At the fourth line she pauses to throw a hair pin at the mirror, which sticks in the carved cherubs forehead. As she sings the last two lines, she climbs up and stands on the dresser to look at her reflection, which shows Agatha instead. While she laughs, Kurt sees this and is stunned as he backs away from the window.

"The sea witch! She's gonna, I gotta-" In his state of shock he runs into the side of the ship before correcting himself. "Ariel!" he yells as he flies. When he finds her, he lands right next to her and begins to babble about what he saw.

"Ariel! Ariel! I was flying, of course I was flying, And I sa- I saw that the watch, the witch was watching a mirror, and she was singing with a stolen set of pipes!" He grabs Remy and starts shaking him to emphasis his point. "Do you hear what I'm telling you? THE PRINCE IS MARRYING ZE SEA WITCH IN DISGUISE!"

"Are you sure about dis?" Remy asks, rubbing his head because all the shaking gave him a headache.

"Have I ever been wrong? I mean when it's important!" Kurt exclaims, still panicky.

"What are we gonna do?" Sam asks. Jean looks out to sea at the departing ship and sees that the sun is beginning to set. She hears Agatha's voice in her head, echoing.

_**"Before the sun sets on the third day."**_

Her mind obviously made up, Jean jumps into the water. But she can't swim very well with two legs, espeacially while in a dress. Thinking quickly, Remy uses his claws to cut the ropes holding some barrels. They fall into the water and float.

"Ariel, grab onto dat! Flounder, get her to dat boat as fast as yo' fins can carry you!" Remy commands.

"Ah'll try!" Sam says, pulling the barrel that Jean's holding onto by the rope.

"Remy gotta get de sea king. He must know about dis!" Remy says.

"What, what about me? What about ME?" Kurt asks.

"You, find a way to STALL DAT WEDDING!" Remy tells him before diving into the water.

"Stall ze wedding? How, what, ZAT'S IT!" Kurt suddenly flies off and begins rounding up the birds, seals, and other creatures.

"Move it, let's go, we got an emergency here!" he tells all of them.

Meanwhile, the wedding is already in progress. As 'Wanda' walks down the aisle, Roberto growls at her. Wanda kicks him, making him whimper and back away. Apparently nobody noticed. Meanwhile Pietro, the priest, is taking full advantage of his extra screen time by hamming up the part by dressing up as an Elvis impersonator, complete with bad accent and weird hair wig.

"Uh dearly beloved. We are a-gathered here today to join.."

Here the scene switches to Sam and Jean. Sam is trying his hardest to pull the barrell to the ship so that they can get there before sunset, but he's having a hard time of it.

"Don't worry Ariel, ugh. We-we're gonna make it. We're almost there.

And now back at the ship, Pietro is still hamming up the part.

"Alright, now do you, Eric, a-take Vannessa to be your lawfully wedded wife, for as long as you both shall live?" he asks.

"I do." Scott says, still in monotone.

"And now, do you-" Before Pietro can finish his sentence, Kurt and the animals he rounded up swoop in to attack and cause massive chaos. Roberto decides to get in on the act. The birds dive bomb 'Wanda', the lobsters pinch her, the starfish stick to her face, and Roberto bites her in the butt. While this is happening, Jean climbs onto the ship. Kurt tries to wrench the seashell away, and in the struggle, it breaks off and shatters on the deck, releasing Jean's voice in a ball of light. Scott snaps out of his trance just as Jean's voice returns to her throat and she sings.

"Ariel?" Scott asks.

"Eric!" Jean exclaims, using her voice once more.

"You, you can talk! You're the one!" he says as he goes to her.

"Eric, get away from her!" 'Wanda' says with Agatha's voice, than claps a hand over her mouth.

"It was you all along!" Scott says to Jean, taking her into his arms.

"Oh Eric, I wanted to tell you." Jean whispers as the two lean in.

"ERIC NO!" 'Wanda' yells, still with Agatha's voice.

But just as they're less than half an inch away from kissing, the sun fully sets and Jean groans and collapses to the deck. 'Wanda' laughs evilly.

"You're too late!" she cackles as Scott sees Jean's mermaid tail. She turns back into Agatha with octopus tentacles and grabs Jean. She then blows a kiss at Scott. "So long, lover boy!" That said, she dives into the water, and takes Jean with her.

"Ariel!" Scott exclaims. Underwater, Agatha is dragging Jean by her wrist.

"Poor little princess. It's not you I'm after. I've a much bigger fish to fry." she tells her.

"Ursulla stop!" Hank's voice commands. Agatha and Jean turn around to see Hank aiming his trident at Agatha.

"Why King Triton, ha ha ha, How are you?" Agatha laughs.

"Let her go." Hank hisses.

"Not a chance, Triton. She's mine now! We made a deal." Agatha says, producing the contract.

"Daddy I'm sorry! I didn't mean to! I didn't know!" Jean pleads. Hank aims his trident at the contract and shoots. When the smoke and bubbles clear however, the contract doesn't have so much as a rip or tear on it. Agatha laughs.

"You see? The contract's legal, binding and completly unbreakable. Even for YOU. Of course, I always was a girl with an eye for a bargain. The daughter of the great sea king is a very precious commodity. But I might be willing to make an exchange for someone even better." she says suggestivley.

Meanwhile Scott is in a small row boat, rowing away from the ship.

"Eric. What are you doing?" Magneto calls out, still in monotone.

"Grimm I lost her once, I'm not losing her again!" Scott calls back.

Back to Agatha and Hank. Agatha is holding another contract in front of him, while he's holding a pen. Jean is trapped in a circle of light and is slowly withering into one of those freaky plant things.

"Now, do we have a deal?" she asks. Looking away, Hank signs the contract. Agatha snaps the paper back into a roll when he's done. "HA! It's done then!"

With that said, Jean is released and Hank withers into a freaky plant thing with giant eyeballs and a beard. His crown encircles him and the trident is stuck in the ground near him. Agatha laughs as Jean and Remy look at Hank.

"Yo' Majesty." Remy says sadly.

"Daddy?" Jean asks in sad disbelief.

"At last." Agatha proclaims triumphantly as she lifts up the crown and puts it on. She then picks up the trident and begins to laugh.

"You, you monster!" Jean exclaims, moving to attack her. Agatha grabs her.

"Don't fool with me you little brat! Contract or no, AAAGGHHH!" she cries out as a harpoon hits her in the arm. She whirls around and sees Scott floating there, obviously holding his breath. "Why you little troll!" she snaps.

"Hi everybody!" AnonGirl88 pops in suddenly, followed by Mr. L and a grinning Fishy.

"Where have you been?" Forge demands.

"Sorry, I had to ditch the lawyers before I could sick Fishy on them." AnonGirl88 shrugs. "What scene are we on?"

"Scott just threw the harpoon at Agatha when you showed up." Ray tells her.

"Sweet. Start where you left off then!"

"Eric, Eric look out!" Jean yells to Scott, who's swimming back up to the surface.

"After him!" Agatha commands. Lance and Pietro go after him.

"Come on!" Remy says to Sam. The two of them go to help Scott by attacking Lance and Pietro.

"Say goodbye to your little sweetheart." Agatha says to Jean, aiming the trident at Scott.

"STUNT DOUBLES!" AnonGirl88 yells through her beloved bullhorn.

Lance and Pietro switch with two robot eels that look suspicously like Principal Kelly and Duncan Matthers. Just as Agatha is about to shoot, Jean grabs her hair and pulls back, causing Agatha to shoot the eels instead of Scott. She's devastated.

"Babies! My poor little poopsies." she cries. She then growls and sees Jean helping Scott swim to the surface. She starts to hyperventilate angrilly as she is surrounded by black smokye ink.

On the surface, Jean and Scott are holding each other as the water beneath them begins to glow.

"Eric you've got to get away from here!" Jean says desperately.

"No, I won't leave you!" Scott says, holding her tighter. Suddenly a huge Agatha rises up and laughs.

"You pitiful, insiginifigant fool!" she states in a loud, low booming voice.

"Look out!" Scott yells as he and Jean are seperated.

"Now I am ruler of all the ocean! The waves obey my every whim! The sea and all it's spoils bow to my power!" Agatha crows as she wreaks havok by creating a whirlpool which brings up some old shipwrecks.

"ERIC!" Jean screams as she falls to the dry bottom of the whirlpool. While Agatha is playing with her new powers, Scott climbs up onto one of the old ships.

"So much for true love!" Agatha cackles. Just as she's about to finish off Jean, Scott takes advantage of one of the waves and steers the ship right into Agatha, impaling her on the broken mast. She shrieks in agony and dies. Scott collapses on the beach, and the trident returns to Hank, who makes everything go back to normal.

"DING DONG, THE WITCH IS DEAD! WHICH OLD WITCH? THE WICKED WITCH!" AnonGirl88, Pyro, the entire Brotherhood and half the New Recruits sing as they do a hoe-down.

"WOULD YOU MANIACS KNOCK IT OFF, HOW CAN I ACT DEAD IF YOU IDIOTS KEEP SINGING!"Agatha screams at them.

"But everyone expects us to sing that song!" AnonGirl88 protests.

"In fact it's become almost a tradition for directors and cast members of a parody to sing that song upon the demise of any villianess." Shanice states, causing everyone to look at her like she's insane.

"Whatever. Look, we're almost done, so let's just try to finish this, okay?" Hank says.

"Got it! ACTION!" AnonGirl88 and Pyro shout through their bull horns.

Early in the morning, Jean is sitting on a rock forlornly watching Scott as he lays on the beach, still out cold. Hank and Remy look on.

"She really does love him, doesn't she Sebastion?" Hank asks him.

"Hmm. Well, it's like Remy always says. Children got to be free to live der own lives." Remy says wisely.

"You always say that?" Hank says wryly. Remy chuckles embarrasedly as Hank sighs.

"Well than I guess there's just one problem left."

"An' what's day, Yo' Majesty."

"How much I'm going to miss her." he says sadly before turning Jean into a human.

Scott starts to wake up just as Jean walks onto the beach with her new legs, wearing a sparkly dress. The two embrace and kiss passionatley. The kiss fades into the kiss on their wedding day, during which Roberto interrupts them by licking their faces. Everyone is happy. Fred suddenly attacks Remy and chases him around the ship until Remy cuts a rope and sends him flying. Remy then jumps into the water and bows dramatically for Sam and Kurt.

"Merci! Merci."

Hank uses the trident to raise the water so he can give Jean one last hug.

"I love you Daddy." she whispers to him, tears in her eyes. She then goes back to Scott and they hug and wave good bye to Jeans family. Kurt carries Sam up so he can wave good bye, then he winks and flashes the O.K sign at the newlyweds as he flies down. The ship sails away as all the mermaids wave good bye.

"WE'RE DONE!" AnonGirl88 and Pyro yell gleefully as they dance around their new bon fire.

"Heywaitaminuteyoucan'tendtheparodywithouttellinguswhothefakeWandais!" Pietro exclaims.

"Huh?" AnonGirl88 and Pyro stop dancing and stare at him.

"I said you can't end the parody without telling us who the fake Wanda is!" Pietro slows down.

"But, bon fire!" AnonGirl88 whines.

"It's only going to take a couple seconds to tell them." Fake Wanda says.

"Then you tell them. We're busy!" AnonGirl88 says before she and Pyro go back to celebrating.

"Fine by me. Name's Morph." the Fake Wanda says before turning into a short man with pale skin and black hair.

"You mean from the original X-Men cartoons?" Bobby asks.

"Yep. Psycho over there needed some help, and I didn't have anything better to do, so here I am!" Morph shrugs.

"I heard that, who are you calling a psycho, psycho!" AnonGirl88 stops her bad dancing to glare at Morph.

Before the two can start arguing, Kitty comes onto the set.

"Hey Anon, there's an Australian guy with brown spikey hair and goggles at the front gate. He says his name's Valon and that he's looking for someone named Saria." the valley girl informs her.(1)

Upon hearing the name Valon, the insane director blanches sheet white then blushes cherry red. Without warning she pastes a huge fake grin on her face and grabs Pyro.

"Well, that's all for this parody! We hope you enjoyed the show, drive safely, and remember to spay and neuter your pets! Come on, Pyro, we have to go now!"

"But what about the bon fire?" Pyro whimpers.

"We'll make an even bigger one _after_we leave! In fact, we're going to go burn down a whole building, your choice, now let's GO!" And for the umpteenth time since the parody started, the two pyromaniacs ONCE AGAIN run off, leaving everyone bewildered.

"What the heck was that about?" Scott asks.

"Who knows. Let's just get out of here before they come back." Lance replies.

(1): Inside joke.

And that's it. For the hardcore X-Men fans, sorry if my description of Morph is a bit off. I don't really read comic books, and it's been forever and eternity since I saw the old show. If you want to find out what was going on when we were rounding up the run aways, look out for On The Road Again!. Yes I'm aware that that is a lame title. All the good ones were taken! Well whatever. When that's done, I'll begin work on my Dracula story At Long Last, and then the Dracula/X-Men: Evolution crossover Lost Amongst the Shadows. That one will be in Crossovers, so don't look for it in Dracula or X-Men: Evolution.

Mange: You're babbling again.

AnonGirl88: Oops, sorry!

_**Shout outs!**_

Summers Groupie: Heh, I certainly think it's going to be good. But I have to do that Dracula story first, otherwise people will be lost.

Helen: You're very welcome. Thank you for reviewing! Well I can't keep this story going, but check out On The Road Again! when it's out.

Kurumas Girl Angel: Hi you know who from you know where! Glad you liked my story!

psychobunny410: Good guess, but as you can see it wasn't Mastermind. Thanks so much! Be on the look out for On The Road Again! when it's out.

Emily: Another good guess, but it wasn't Candyce either. Hope this was soon enough for you!


End file.
